FalsePassion&SelfishLove
by ByouHitsukitty
Summary: Tangled story of passion, hatred, cheating, and romance.


**INTRODUCTION**

**He stood there quietly, the water gently hitting his face. Slowly, he closed his eyes, flashbacks of heat, and tangled sheets ran through his mind. He quickly shut them out, shaking his head. How could he have done this to Yomi? How would he tell him?**

"**Shou? Shou I'm home! Are you here?" Yomi dropped his keys and looked at the mail strewn on the table. Looking through it, but not reading it, he pushed it away. Hearing the running water, he turned and walked towards the bathroom. Lightly, he knocked.**

"**Shou? I'm home now, 'kay? I have a surprise for you, so hurry up!" smiling to himself, Yomi walked into the bedroom to change.**

**Shame filled Shou. He stood with on hand against the wall his head hanging low. He sighed heavily and turned off the water. He slid open the foggy glass door of the shower and grabbed his towel. Loosely wrapping the towel around his hips, Shou stepped carefully out of the shower. He stood for a moment, motionless, wondering whether the moisture running down his cheek was water or tears. It reached his lips and he tasted the saltiness. He hadn't realized he was crying. Quickly, he wiped away the tear and tightened his towel.**

"**Hurry up, buddy! I'm very excited to tell you something!" laughed Yomi**

"**Damn it" Shou muttered, "Alright Yom, I'll be out in a sec!" slamming his palms onto the bathroom counter, Shou exhaled loudly. He stood there, silent, thinking, dreading…"How do I tell him?"**

**Riku looked out the window, breathing lightly. An expression of worry painted on his face. Jui had been gone a long time. Riku tried calling, texting, everything. Jui was nowhere to be found. The thought of going out and searching everywhere had crossed Riku's mind more than once, be he figured it would be best to stay home in case Jui returned.**

"**Jui," Riku whimpered softly, the damp trails of passed tears on his face, "Jui, where are you?"**

**Chapter 1...**

**Shou entered the bedroom to find everything as he had left it, with the exception of Yomi's clothes that were now on the bed. In his despair, Shou still couldn't help but smile. A hint of cinnamon hung in the air from the candle Shou had lit not too long before. Hearing Yomi in the kitchen singing to himself, Shou quickly got dressed, pausing only for a second to fix his hair in the mirror. Making sure every spike and wisp was in place, Shou grabbed his sweater, took a deep breath, and left the room.**

**Light from outside filled the small room where Riku had now fallen asleep, cell phone in hand. Outside a car door slammed jolting Riku from his sleep and causing him to drop his phone to the floor. Sitting for a moment and blinking heavily, Riku was now wide awake and he jumped from his seat. Running to the window he ripped open the curtains and quickly looked outside.**

"**Thank God!" he ran to the door, pulling on it before he had fully turned the knob. He burst out with so much force that he stopped for a moment to check whether he had broken the hinge or not.**

**Finding nothing wrong with the door, Riku ran as fast as he could to the tall golden haired beauty standing by the garage door. Throwing his arms around him, Riku tried speaking, but his voice was too quivery. Standing for a moment in Jui's embrace, Riku cleared his throat.**

"**I was so scared! Why didn't you answer my calls or my texts?" Jui remained silent, his chin resting on Riku's shoulder, while his head leaning against Riku's temple.**

"**Hey…" Riku pulled away from Jui's hold and grasped his face in his small hands. He looked deep into Jui's eyes and his brown furrowed as Jui dropped his gaze.**

"**Ju? What's wrong?"**

"**Nothing's wrong, Yom." Shou lied through a small forced smile. "Now, what was it you wanted to tell me?"**

**Chapter 2...**

**Riku and Jui stood silently in the driveway, their breath forming small clouds on the cold air. Jui shivered as a small tear moved slowly down his smooth cheek.**

"**You what?" Riku asked, his voice small and timid.**

"**I'm…I'm…"Jui hung his head even lower, his chin almost touching his chest.**

"**How could you? What possessed you…"Riku's voice trailed off as birds sung quietly in the tree's. "We'll talk about it later. C'mon, let's go inside." Riku started to walk away but something stopped him. He turned around to see Jui standing there, his left arm fully extended, and his hand firmly grasping Riku's wrist.**

"**Jui, c'mon, it's almost sunrise. Let's go inside, get some sleep, and we'll talk this over at a more reasonable hour." Jui didn't move. Riku turned his head away and sighed, his arm still in Jui's hand. He stood there, deep in thought and heard Jui sniffing behind him.**

**Finally, he turned and pulled on Jui's arm. Jui stumbled forward andfell to his knees on the asphalt in front of Riku. Silently, he began to sob.**

"**Jui, please! Not right here! People might be watching!"Riku tried again to pull away, but Jui now had hold of Riku's ankle and was weeping into his knee.**

"**Riku" he sobbed. Riku could feel tears welling up in his eyes. Cautiosly, he looked around to see if anyone was watching. Then, he slowly lowered himself to his left knee and took Jui into his arms. Jui's cries became muffled by Riku's shoulder.**

"**please…please…"Jui cried.**

"**Shh..Don't, shhh. It's ok, calm down."Riku stroked Jui's hair and rocked gently back and forth.**

**Jui pulled away, his hands slid down to Riku's small waist. He took a deep breath and raised his eyes to Riku's. They knelt there for what seemed like hours, eyes locked.**

"**Please…please, forgive me."**

"**You seem upset, Shou, you sure you're alright?"Yomi asked concerned, but still with a gleam of joy in his eyes.**

**Shou smiled. "Of course I'm fine. Now, what did you want to tell me?"**

**Yomi's face beamed. He began to bounce up and down with excitement as he pulled an envelope out of his pocket and handed it to Shou. He began to giggle as Shou opened it…**

**Chapter 3...**

**Shou stopped opening the envelope and looked at Yomi whose eyes glowed with enthusiasm.**

"**Well? Open it, silly!"Yomi chirped.**

**Shou sighed.**

"**Yom, I don't deserve this."**

"**You don't even know what it is!" Yomi laughed at Shou's foolishness, Shou hung his head, fiddling with the envelope in his hand. After a long pause, he opened the envelope and his eyes widened. Yomi squealed and threw his arms around Shou's neck.**

**Shou stood holding the envelope behind Yomi's back, staring at its contents in shock.**

**Jui sat curled up in the corner of the couch wrapped in Riku's thick blue blanket. He stared blankly at the wall while Riku fixed up the bed. Jui buried his face in his knees as he recalled what he had done.**

**Riku walked silently past Jui to gather some pillows and blankets from the couch. Cigarette smoke hung thick in the air of the small room. Jui reached out quickly and grabbed Rikus hand, pulling it close to his face. A small smile played on Riku's lips. He took a few steps forward and allowed Jui to rest his head on his stomach. Jui kissed Riku's hand, gently over and over.**

"**Riku," Jui whispered, "can you ever find it in your heart to forgive me? Can you?" Jui looked pleadingly at Riku's Pale face. Riku looked down at Jui and smiled.**

"**Of…of course I can." Kneeling on the floor in front of Jui, Riku took both of Jui slender hands into his own and brought them towards his lips.**

"**Just tell me."**

"**What?"**

"**Just tell me why! What did I do? What did I do to cause this?" Jui's eyes widened in disbelief.**

"**You? Oh, Riku, you did absolutely nothing wrong! I love you! It's just…"**

"**It's just what?" Riku gazed on Jui's soft face. It seemed to be glowing in the gray light of the coming dawn.**

"**I don't know…" Jui threw his arms into the air. "I don't know what I want. I know I want you, Riku, and only you!" Riku's glance passed from Jui to the floor. He couldn't let Jui see him upset. He must remain calm. But he could feel the tears forming quickly in his eyes.**

**Riku didn't care anymore. He looked Jui straight in the eyes, his face slightly pink from holding back his emotions.**

"**Then why Jui? Why?"**

**Chapter 4...**

"**Do you like it? I know it's not that special, but maybe afterwards we can come back home and, well, you know." Yomi smiled.**

"**Oh, Yom"**

"**Only if you want to! I don't want it to seem like I'm making you do something you dont want to do!"**

**Shou stood and looked down at his hands that were holding the envelope. Inside were reservations to the most expensive restaurant in Tokyo. He couldn't help but break a smile. He looked at Yomi who who had a very expectant expression on his round face.**

"**Yomi"**

"**Yeah?"**

"**I'd love to." Yomi squealed with joy and excitement and threw his arms around Shou's neck again. Shou made a fake choking noise that made Yomi laugh.**

"**Ok, lets hurry and get ready! It's 5 o'clock now and dinner is at 7."**

**Shou smiled and nodded. He gave Yomi a small gentle kiss on the cheek and went to get ready for his romantic evening.**

**Riku layed down next to Jui on the small bed. Jui was already asleep and he stirred as Riku fiddled with the covers. Riku put his arm carefully around Jui and began to stroke his smooth hair. He struggled to keep his eyes open, afraid if he closed the Jui would disappear again.**

**Jui rolled over, opening his eyes only for a second, and that one second was just enough to put Riku at peace. Slowly, he closed his eyes as Jui rested his head on Riku's small chest.**

"**I love you." Jui whispered. Riku smiled and fell sound asleep.**

**At Aragawa, Yomi talked a mile a minute. Shou sat with his head in his hand watching Yomi in amusement. By the time the food arrived, Yomi had settled down a little bit. Shou took a small amount of food between his chopsticks and held it towards Yomi. Yomi smiled and ate what was offered him. He returned the favor to Shou who accepted, blushing.**

**After their plates were cleared, Yomi rested his elbow on the table, his hand sitting in his hand. He looked at Shou who was brushing crumbs off the table. Shou looked and to see Yomi staring at him. He let out an embaressed laugh when Yomi giggled at him.**

"**Well Shou, what do you say we finish this lovely evening at home?" Shou nodded in agreement. A sharp pain hit his chest as Yomi raised his hand for the check.**

"**Yom, listen."**

"**One sec, how much of a tip should I leave? You're better at math than I am." Yomi laughed at himself. Shou slammed his hand down onto the check and looked at Yomi.**

**Yomi jumped and looked slowly from Shou's hand to his face.**

"**Everything ok Shou?" Yomi raised his eyebrow.**

"**Yomi, listen to me, please!"Shou sighed, "Theres…theres something I need to get off my chest."Yomi put his hand onto Shou's.**

"**Shh, I know."**

"**You do?"**

**Yomi winked and took Shou's hand off his own.**

"**Just you wait until we get home." He smirked and put the tip on the table.**

**Chapter 5**

**The drive home from Aragawa was tedious and excruciating for Shou. Yomi drove, singing along to the CD that was playing while Shou went over what he would tell Yomi in his head. It had to be perfect and get the point across without hurting Yomi. He couldn't bear to hurt Yomi.**

**The pulled into the driveway about 9 o'clock. Yomi put the car in drive and shut off the engine. He smiled at Shou as he unbuckled. Shou gave a weak smile in return.**

**Yomi had a large grin on his face as the approached the door. Shou was shaking. He was scared to ruin such a perfect evening. Yomi grabbed Shou's hand as he opened the door. He pushed it open and nudged Shou inside.**

**Shou's jaw dropped as he looked around. All the lights were off and candles were lit in every room. Rose petals covered the floor. Rose scented candles made a path down the hall to the bedroom. Shou felt his eyes get misty.**

"**So, whatya think?"**

"**How…how the hell did you do all this?"**

**Yomi smiled.**

"**When you went to the bathroom before we left the restaurant I called Hizuki and asked him to come over here and do this for me. You like it?" everything Shou had planned to say to Yomi melted away and he began to cry.**

"**Yomi, it's beautiful!" he hugged Yomi. "I love you so much it hurts!" Yomi hugged Shou tightly. He extended his arm towards the candle path.**

"**Shall we?" Shou smiled, wiping away a tear. They walked back the hallway and exchanged a passionate kiss as they closed the bedroom door.**

**Riku woke up lying on his side. He could feel Jui's arm draped over his waist, his body pressed lightly against his own. Riku sighed, a smile painted on his face. He felt cool moisture on his shoulder and he rolled over to find Jui awake. Jui gave him a small kiss.**

"**Mmm" Jui moaned and cuddled up to Riku. "Rik? Tell me last night didn't happen. Tell me everything will be ok!" Jui whispered in a smooth voice.**

**Riku stroked Jui's cheek and gentley kissed him on the nose.**

"**Oh , Jui. I wish I could say it didn't happen, but it did. But, we're going to pretend like it didn't." he leaned in and kissed Jui softly on the neck. "I love you."**

"**I love you too, Riku."**

**Chapter 6**

**Small trails of smoke floated towards the ceiling as the candles went out. The faint smell of scented wax was still in the air. Yomi closed his eyed and let out a heavy exhale. He smiled. Shou lay on his back, staring blankly upwards. He had let this go too far.**

"**Yomi? Yomi? Are you awake?" yomi grumbled something as he cuddled closer to Shou's warm body, still damp from the sweat. Yomi rubbed his cheek against Shou's chest. He giggled quietly as he reached his arm over Shou and stroked his ribs.**

"**Yomi, stop."Yomi laughed and kissed Shou's chest, tasting its lingering saltiness.**

"**Yomi, stop. JUST STOP IT, OK?"Yomi sat up, shocked as he turned and looked at Shou.**

"**What the hell, Shou? What's wrong?"**

"**I have to tell you something."**

"**Well, shit, man! Why didn't you say so? No need to yell at me! I was just trying to make the moment last and…"**

"**Shut up and listen to me! God, Yomi, you never fucking listen!" Shou breathed heavily and Yomi stared at him, his lips parted slightly.**

"**Shou, I…" Yomi closed his mouth, afraid to cry.**

**Shou swung his legs over the edge of the bed, his shoulders hunched as he slapped his hands onto his knees. Yomi sat, cross legged, his arms limpy laying on his lap. His chin began to quiver and he hung his head. He squeezed his eyes tightly and began to cry. Shou sighed and turned to Yomi. This is exactly what he didn't want to happen.**

"**Yom? Hey, listen…" shou reached for Yomi but he pulled away. Yomi looked at Shou with and expression of disgust on his face and Shou was taken a back. Yomi threw the covers off and pulled on his tattered jeans. He shot one more glance back at Shou as he left the room. Shou stared at the empty doorway.**

"**What have I done?"**

**Jui looked up from his book as Riku sat on the couch next to him. He smiled pleasantly at him and returned to his reading. Riku inched closer to Jui and put his arm around him. Without stopping his reading, Jui snuggled into Riku's embrace.**

**There was a faint buzzing noise coming from the kitchen.**

"**Jui? Whats that noise?" Jui looked at Riku, then towards the direction of the buzzing. They both sat they both sat trying to figure out what it was. Jui laughed.**

"**Well, God forbid one of us goes to find out what it is." He closed his book and rose from the couch, dragging his arm along Riku's shoulders as he walked away.**

**Riku sat, watching TV. He heard Jui burst out laughing in the kitchen.**

"**What was it, Ju?" he asked, laughing.**

"**My stupid phone. Man, why did we get so paranoid about that?"Jui could hear Riku laugh from the other room.**

"**I have no idea."**

**Smiling, Jui checked his phone.**

"**Shit!" his phone dropped to the floor as he read the text…**

**Chapter 7  
Riku lounged on the couch, changing the channels but not really seeing what was on. He jumped when he heard something drop to the floor in the kitchen. He pulled himself up with one arm to look over the back of the couch towards the kitchen.  
"Ju?" he laughed, " Y'alright in there?" there was no response. "Ju?" Riku started to rise from the couch when Jui came out of the kitchen and pulled on his coat.  
"Where are you going?"Jui seemed in a trance. He moved quickly, almost robotic to gather his boots and hat.  
"JUI!" Riku grabbed Jui's shoulders and shook him. Jui blinked and stared at Riku.  
"Sorry." He smiled weakly. "I was just gonna run some errands. I'll be back soon."  
"Well, I'll come with you!" Riku reached for his jacket. He did not want to lose Jui. Not again.  
"NO! I mean, no. That's alright." Jui stood for a moment thinking of something to say that would ensure his return. He knew he would come home, but he wanted to reassure Riku."  
"I'll bring home some dinner. Maybe even some wine? I dunno. Any preference?" Riku smiled.  
"Anything. Really, anything would be fine." he leaned in and kissed Jui on the cheek. He opened the door as Jui walked out.  
"Hey!" Jui turned towards Riku and snow began to fall lightly. He squinted and glanced quickly towards the cloudy sky. "What time will you be home?" Jui rolled his eyes upwards as if to act like he was in deep thought. Riku laughed. He loved it when Jui did that. Jui walked towards Riku and pushed his hand through the hair on the back of Riku's head. He pulled him closer and kissed him tenderly on the lipes.  
"I'll be back before seven. I promise."**

Kazuki sat a cup of steaming tea on the table and pulled out a chair. Yomi sat across from him, his arms folded on the table and his face buried in them. He sniffed.  
"Why, Zuki? I haven't ever done ANY wrong to him! I've always love him and showered him with goods and everything he asked for! Why did he yell at me like that? Why?"  
Kazuki reached over the table and put his hand on Yomi's arm. He patted it slightly. Yomi lifted his head, his face was tear stained and his eyes were bloodshot. Kazuki clicked his tongue and grabbed a box of tissues.  
"I don't know man. It's not right, I'll say that much." The door opened and Byou walked in. he dropped his keys on the table and looked at Yomi.  
"Good lord! What the hell happened?" Yomi closed his eyes and slammed his head onto the table. "Kaz! What the hell happened?" Kazuki glared and Byou. He stood up and grabbed Byou's wrist.  
"Kitchen. NOW!" Kazuki told Byou everything that had happened.  
"Please, Byou. Just let me calm him down a little. Could he maybe stay here the night?"  
"That's fine. Damn, I swear, if this thing doesn't get sorted out, I swear to GOD the next time I see Shou imam punch him dead in the face and rip off his b…"  
"BYOU! Hey now, let's not get violent, ok? Calm down."  
Byou sighed and walked out to Yomi. He sat, his arms limp at his sides. He stared blankly at his cup of tea.  
"Heya, Yomi?" Yomi looked up. "Would, ah, would you want to stay here tonight?"  
"I don't wanna be any trouble."  
"No! it's no trouble!" Kazuki interrupted Byou before he could say something. He walked to Yomi and knelt next to him, his hand rested on Yomi's shoulder. "We have a pull out sofa and LOTS of pillows and blankets" Yomi sighed. He sat silently for a while. He looked at Byou who stood leaning against the doorway chewing gum, then to Kazuki who was looking at him with a look of compassion.  
"OK. Thank you, guys."

**Chapter 8...**

**Byou sat at the table, his fingers twitching on the handle of his mug. His eyes narrowed as he watched Kazuki get the couch ready for Yomi. The shower started upstairs and Byou stood up. He shuffled over to the couch.**

"**Zuki?"**

"**Yeah, Byou? Wanna help me with this sheet?" Byou grabbed two corners of the sheet and began to tuck then under the pull out mattress.**

"**Zuki, I'm sorry for the way I acted tonight. I mean, Yomi is my friend. I hate to see him hurt like that." Kazuki smiled. It was on very rare occassions that Byou addmitted he was wrong about something. He patted the wrinkles out of the blanket and handed it to Byou.**

"**It's ok, Byou. He's my friend too. It's sad to see him treated this way. We'll just have to postpone our plans for tonight to some other time." Kazuki rubbed Byou's shoulder as he walked past and Byou sighed. Kazuki walked down the hallway towards the stairs.**

"**Imma see if Yomi needs anything. You wanna finish up the bed?"**

"**Yeah, Yeah, I got it." Kazuki smirked when he heard Byou grumbling to himself as he fluffed the pillows. Byou hated house work. He could hear Kazuki humming upstairs and he couldn't help but smile a little.**

**There was a quiet knock on the door as Byou put the final pillow on the bed.**

"**Kazuki!" Byou yelled from the bottom of the stairs, "theres somebody here!"**

"**Well, get the damn door! I'm up here, what do you expect me to do about it, huh?" Byou growled.**

"**Fine!" he walked to the door and cleared his throat. He took a deep creath to compose himself as he pulled the door open. His mouth opened to offer a fake happy greeting to the visitor, but he soon closed it.**

"**H…h…hey! Hey man! What the hell are you doin' here?"**

"**Hey, Byou. Long time no see."**

**Riku tried to busy himself to take his mind off worrying about Jui. He kept catching himself looking at the clock. He closed his eyes and shook his head.**

"**No, keep it together, Riku…keep it together! He'll be home before seven…he promised he'd be home before seven…" Riku began to breathe heavily. He glanced towards his phone that was next to him on the couch. His hand moved slowly across his leg towards the phone..he closed his eyes.**

"**C'mon, Yomi! Pick up the damn phone! PICK UP!"**

***beep***

*****_please leave your message for phone numb-*_

"**Shit!" Shou threw his phone across the room, cracking the mirror on the dresser. He knees gave out and he collapsed to the floor next to the bed.**

"**What…have…I…done?"Shou cried until his eyes were dry and he began to cough uncontrollably. When he had finished he sat there motionless, staring at the doorway where Yomi had walked out hours before.**

"**Please, please come home Yomi, please…"**

**He began to cry again… **

**Chapter 9**

**Shou woke up on the floor next to the bed. He began to roll over and his back popped. He moaned in pain. Sniffing, he sat up and checked his phone. He had only slept for an hour. He sighed and pulled himself to his feet. He tried to call Yomi again, but it went straight to voicemail.**

**Walking towards the kitchen, Shou picked up the candles left on the floor. He could feel the tears coming back. After putting the candles on the table, he opened the refrigerator and glanced over its contents. His gaze passed from the food to the cabinet above the stove. Would he go back down that road? Would he throw away everything Yomi had helped him overcome?**

**He walked across the kitchen and opened the cabinet. Slowly, like a child with his hand in the cookie jar, Shou pulled down the bottle of whiskey. He sat on the floor, opened the bottle, and took a drink.**

"**Come in! Come in! God, dude, I havent seen you in a long time! How the hell ya been?" Byou closed the door behind the visitor.**

"**Yeah, it's been a while. I've been…ok, I guess. All things considering." He smiled and Byou took his coat.**

"**Have a seat! We just made some tea, would you like some?" Byou began to busy himself with looking for a clean tea cup.**

"**Don't worry yourself with it, re—"**

"**Who is it, Byou?"Kazuki yelled from upstairs.**

"**You wouldn't believe me if I told you! Come down and see!" Byou heard Kazuki come pounding down the stairs. He could tell when he skipped steps.**

"**Well, ho-ly shit!" Kazuki said as he entered the kitchen.**

"**Hey, Zuki. Long time no see, huh? Yomi texted me and asked me to come over. I hope that's ok."**

"**Are you kidding?" Kazuki pulled Jui into his arms " I missed you. Hey! You want some tea or something to drink?"**

"**Already on it, Zuk." Byou smiled.**

**Yomi came slowly down the stairs rubbing his wet hair with a towel. Jui stood up when he saw him. Yomi's eyes lit up at the sight of Jui and he ran to him, embracing him with extreme force.**

"**Thank you for coming."**

"**Don't worry about it. I hate to rush this, because it sounds important, but I did promise Riku I'd be home before seven." Yomi glanced at the clock. 4:47.**

"**Ok, we'll try and make it quick." Yomi grabbed Jui by the wrist and dragged him to the living room. Kazuki started to follow, but Byou grabbed him by the shirt tail and pulled him back. He shook his head and handed Kazuki a dish towel.**

"**Dishes?" Byou asked with a small smile. Kazuki nodded as Byou walked into the kitchen. His glance moved towards the living room and he sighed.**

"**Been too long, Jui. Too long."**

**Riku stretched his body over the table to clean the far side with a damp cloth. He swore the house had never been this clean before. Maybe Jui needed to go out more so he could worry and clean. Riku laughed at the thought.**

**He clapped his hands together to get the crumbs off. He sighed, hands on his hips. He was proud of what he had accomplished. He checked his phone. 4:50. Jui still had time.**

**The empty glass bottle rolled out of his hand making a loud noise. The taunting black label with white writing that read Jack Daniels stared up at him. He coughed and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.**

**Staggering to his feet, Shou stumbled his way down the hall towards the bathroom. He leaned against the cool tiled wall and looked into the shower. He squeezed his eyes shut and collapsed.**

**Chapter 10...**

"_Please, Yomi! Just one drink? Please? Just to get the edge off? God…YOMI? My head, oh god, my head is killing me!"..._

"_You'll be ok. You're strong Shou! You can do this!"..._

"_No…no I can't I can't! AUGH Yomi, oh god help me please…please"..._

"_Be strong, Shou. Be strong."..._

"_YOMI!"..._

**Shou opened his eyes and blinked at the brightness of the room. The floor was wet from vimot. He wanted to get up but the tiles of the floor were so cool on his face and made his head stop hurting.**

**The doorbell rang and he cringed. The sound made his head spin. He grumbled something as he propped himself against the bathtub. He closed his eyes and let out a heavy sigh. The taste of the whiskey returned and he threw up a little in his mouth. He spit. There was already vomit on the floor, what harm could a little more do? It didn't matter to him. Nothing did.**

**A dark figure appeared in the doorway of the bathroom. Shou squinted at it and looked away.**

"**Yomi?"**

"**No?"**

"**Whataya want then, huh? Go away, I'm not home." He slurred as he spoke. The figure came closer and squatted next to Shou. He was only a blur to Shou and he dropped his chin to his chest. His stomach churned and he groaned.**

"**Look at this place. Look at you! You look like hell."**

"**No shit to the genius, Sherlock!" Shou was irritated and was in pain. "Who the fuck are you""**

"**Wow, you really are wasted. I thought you were over this!"Shou knew the voice but he couldn't remember the face or name or how he knew this person. His eyes began to fog and he broke down crying.**

"**C'mon, man. Let's get you cleaned up."**

"**So? Do you think I should go back to him? He really hurt me, but we've been through so much and I'm just afraid that he might-"Yomi's voice trailed off and his eyes widened.**

"**Might what? What Yomi!" Jui put his hand firmly on Yomi's shoulder. "Might what, Yomi!"**

"**Might do something stupid…"**

"**Like what? What, Yomi? What would he do?" Yomi's chin began to quiver and he burst into tears.**

"**Oh, God, SHou!" he jumped up from the couch and ran towards the door. Byou ran in and pulled Yomi back by wrapping his arm around Yomi's waist.**

"**Easy, buddy. Calm down." Yomi's legs weakened beneath him and he went limp in Byou's arms, sobbing. Byou looked around. Jui sat on the couch, an expression of shock on his face, while Kazuki stood in the kitchen doorway holding a plate that was dripping with soap. Byou gave a pleading look to Kazuki and motioned towards Yomi with his head. Kazuki rolled his eyes and jogged to Yomi, wrapping his arms around his small shaking body. Byou leaned against the wall as if he needed to regain his dignity.**

"**C'mon, Yomi. You can sleep in our room tonight, you'll sleep better there."**

"**What?"**

"**Byou! Shut it! It's just ONE night and..you know what? We're not having this conversation right now." Kazuki guided Yomi up the stairs leaving Jui and Byou silent in the living room.**

**Shou was flat on his back, legs bent with his knee's emerging from the bubbles that filled the tub. A cup of black coffee sat steaming on the rim of the tub.**

"**You sobered up yet?" a voice came from outside the bathroom door. Shou jumped causing the water to splash everywhere. His mind began racing.**

"**Shit! That actually happened? That wasn't one of my drunk hallucinations? Fuck!" he began to panic.**

"**You ok in there? You better not be trying to drown yourself." The voice trailed off down the hallway. Shou dragged himself out of the tub, falling to the floor like a dead fish.**

"**Fuck!" he yelled in pain.**

"**Seriously, dude. You ok?"**

"**I'm fucking fine!" Shou pulled on his robe and tied it around his waist as he threw open the door. His eyes dropped to make eye contact with the person belonging to the mysterious voice.**

"**Oh my god. When did you get back?"**

"**The door was unlocked and…"Shou hugged him like he'd never hugged another being before. He never wanted to let go.**

"**Ruki! I missed you!**

**After Shou had cleaned up and gotten dressed, he went to the living room to talk to Ruki.**

"**Hey, ah..Shou? Earlier you mistook me for someone named Yomi?"**

"**Yeah…"**

"**So, you two are together?"**

"**Yeah, we are."**

"**I see. So you've moved on then?" Shou looked at Ruki whose head hung low.**

"**Ruki. I messed up big time. I fucked up. Ruki?" Ruki looked up. "I screw up."**

**Chapter 11**

**Byou was quiet for a long time. He listened to Kazuki upstairs, his comforting voice calming Yomi's sobs. Byou looked at Jui.**

"**So, what was the real reason you came?" Jui looked up at Byou in shock.**

"**Byou, I thought we were past this. I thought you let it go and moved on!"**

"**It's not an easy thing to let go. I almost lost the love of my life because of you. I will not lose him again because you showed up out of the blue." Jui stared intently at Byou, trying to figure him out.**

"**What a load of shit."**

"**Excuse me?" Byou whirled around as if he might charge Jui, but Jui didn't move. He didn't even flinch.**

"**You say he's the love of your life?"**

"**Yes!"**

"**Then why do you treat him like this?" Byou's brow furrowed. "I'm serious, Byou. You treat him the way you would treat an unwanted guest." Byou scoffed.**

"**Oh, I treat him much different from the way I treat you, I promise you that." Jui closed his eyes and sighed.**

"**Byou, I'm at peace with the fact that you hate me. I'm not here to see you, I came for my friend."**

"**Well, we're taking care of him."Jui nodded and took his coat from the couch. He looked, only for a moment, at the stair case in hopes that Kazuki would come down before he left.**

"**Time to go!" Byou was standing by the door waiting for Jui. He opened it to let Jui out. He walked slowly as if on death row.**

**Jui stopped at his car, halfway in the door and turned towards Byou.**

"**You're a cruel man. Kazuki deserves better than you." He got in the car and started the engine. Byou slammed the door. Kazuki came downstairs to find Byou brooding by the door.**

"**Did Jui leave?"Byou turned his eyes to Kazuki. Kazuki was taken aback to see tears in Byou's eyes. Byou never cried.**

"**Byou?" Byou tried to speak but couldn't. He rolled his eyes and bit his upper lip to compose himself. Kazuki just stood there, not knowing how to handle the situation.**

"**Zuki? Am I…cruel?"**

"**What?"**

"**Just answer the question." Kazuki thought for a moment.**

"**Well, you have your moments of stubbornness, but I know that's just you. That's just who you are. I'm ok with that. It's one of the things I love about you, Byou. What is this about?"**

"**Bullshit."**

"**What?"**

"**I said that's bullshit. If I wasn't here, you would leave with Jui right now, wouldn't you?" Kazuki opened his mouth to speak but Byou held out his hand to stop him. "Don't lie to me. I can't handle lies."**

"**Byou, please! That's all in the past and—where are you going?"**

"**Out."**

"**How did you screw up?"Ruki looked at Shou with compassion. It'd been so long since he'd seen him.**

"**With Yomi. I screwed up. I did something I shouldn't have done, I couldn't tell him, and now he's gone."**

**Ruki looked out the window and sighed.**

"**What's wrong, Ruki?" Ruki whipped his head towards Shou.**

"**You seriously have to ask? You don't remember?"**

"_Shou, let go. I have to leave."_

"_No, no you can't go! Promise me you'll come back, Ruki. Promise me."_

"_I promise, but only if you promise you'll wait for me."_

"_I promise!" they exchanged a passionate kiss and embrace. Then Ruki boarded the train._

"**So, what made you break your promise? You were everything to me, Shou! I would never have come back to this shitty town if it weren't for you!"**

"**You don't understand! Yomi was there for me, he helped me get through the pain of you leaving!"**

"**By sleeping with you?"Shou gasped."You always were a little whore, Shou." Ruki rose from the couch and walked to the door. "I should have left you on the bathroom floor drowning in your own vomit." Ruki slammed the door when he walked out.**

**After getting over the initial shock, Shou ran after him. He had lost him once, then he lost Yomi, he could not lose Ruki again. He wouldn't. He screamed Ruki's name as he ran.**

**Ruki turned to Shou. Shou threw his arms around Ruki and sobbed into his shoulder.**

"**I'm sorry!"**

**Riku jumped up from the table and his game of solitaire. He trotted to the door and opened it for Jui. 6:30. He had kept his promise.**

**Jui walked in with 2 bags full of groceries. He kissed Riku on the cheek as he slipped off his shoes.**

"**I thought I'd make us some dinner tonight, that ok?"Riku smiled. Jui had never made his so happy.**

"**That sounds wonderful! I look forward to it."**

**Jui placed the bags on the counter and turned to face Riku. He placed his hands on Riku's face and pulled him closer. Tenderly, he kissed him on the lips. Why was that, out of all the kisses he received from Jui, why was that the most wonderful kiss? He stood, slightly dumbfounded.**

"**Wha..what was that for?"Jui smiled.**

"**You're the most wonderful person ever." He kissed him again. "I love you."**

**Chapter 12...**

**Candles were lit on the small table and flowers were arranged in a glass in the center. Riku sat and inhaled the scent of cherry blossoms that filled the air. Jui brought out two plates of wonderfully prepared food, and placed one in front of Riku. He sat down opposite Riku with his own plate. He let out a relaxed sigh of satisfaction and accomplishment.**

**They ate in silence, but nothing needed to be said. They exchanged knowing glances and flirtatious smiles as they ate.**

**Jui stood at the sink after dinner, his arms in soapy water up to his elbows. The hairs stood up on the back of his neck when Riku came up from behind and ran his hands along Jui's hips and to his stomach. He kissed Jui's shoulder in the embrace. Jui looked over his shoulder and smiled. He turned with his arms up and out so as not to get soapy water on Riku.**

**Riku ran his fingers over Jui's ribcage as he kissed him, gently forcing his tongue into Jui's mouth. Jui smiled. Riku grabbed him by the hips and lifted him onto the kitchen counter, kissing him the whole time. Jui pulled away, breathing heavily.**

"**Just let me finish up the dis—"he couldn't finish the word before Riku, again, forced his tongue inside. Jui laughed and put his hand on Riku's mouth. "Five minutes."Riku kissed Jui's fingers and Jui pushed him away playfully. Riku winked and walked down the hallway. Jui laughed and shook his head as he returned to the dishes.**

**After he washed the last dish, Jui tip toed down the hall. Wanting to surprise Riku, he flung open the bedroom door but Riku wasn't there. Jui checked behind the door. He knew Riku was playing a game with him. He walked towards the closet when the bedroom door slammed shut behind him. He jumped and turned to find Riku smiling while biting his lip.**

**Riku rushed Jui, pulling him close, pressing his tall slender body against his own. Jui felt short of breath as Riku slid his hands inside Jui's shirt and slipped it off over his head, messing up his hair. Jui exhaled heavily as Riku picked him up. He wrapped his legs around Riku's small waist, kissing his neck and stroking his hair.**

**Riku threw Jui down on the bed and undid the snap on his jeans. Jui gave a taunting, inviting smile and Riku tore off his shirt and leapt on top of Jui, causing him to moan with enthusiasm. Riku licked Jui's neck as he reached for the light.**

**Yomi gasped and sat up straight in bed. What had woke him up? He cautiously pulled off the covers and walked to the bedroom door. He turned the knob slowly to avoid making noise. He opened the door a crack and stuck his head out like a little kid checking for monsters in the closet. He heard muffled noises in the kitchen and shrugged on his robe as he went to investigate.**

**He walked quietly down the stairs taking each step with extreme care. Flattening his back against the wall, he peered around the doorway into the kitchen.**

"**Oh my god!Zuki!" Yomi ran into the kitchen to his friend. The floor was covered with broken plates and glasses. Kazuki was sitting on the floor, slumped next to the dishwasher leaning against the cabinets.**

"**Kazuki! Kazuki look at me, what happened? What happened?" Kazuki looked up, his eyes were red and his hands were covered with blood from the broken glass.**

"**Don't leave me Byou, please don't leave me…not again.. help me Yomi. Don't let him leave me again…I just won back his love…" Kazuki's eyes rolled back into his head and he went limp and fell to the floor.**

"**KAZUKI!"**

**Ruki slouched in the uncomfortable metal chair outside the coffee shop. Shou thanked the cashier and brought the coffee cups to the table. He slowly lowered himself to the chair across from Ruki. He sat with his back straight and stirred his coffee. He looked up from his cup and Ruki didn't move. Shou couldn't tell where Ruki was looking because he was wearing dark sunglasses. Shou wondered why. It was dark out. Maybe he wore them to confuse Shou. Ruki was a mystery like that.**

**Shou opened his mouth to speak when Ruki tipped his head to the side. Shou couldn't take it anymore.**

"**What the hell are you looking at?"Ruki sighed and removed his glasses.**

"**I was watching the smoke from my cigarette. Why? Does me looking at you make you uncomfortable?" Shou stuttered an answer. "You used to love it when I looked at you, Shou. What happened? Don't you love me anymore?"**

**Shou began to answer when his phone rang. It was Yomi. He looked at Ruki.**

"**Answer it." He rose from the table and slammed his hand down to pick up his car keys. "I don't care anymore."**

**Chapter 13...**

"_Kazuki, I thought you loved me!"..._

"_I do, Byou, I do! Please forgive m! I didn't mean to hurt you, it was an accident! A mistake! I'm sorry!"..._

"_A mistake? How is this a mistake? How do you fuck up with something like this? Kazuki, you cheated on me! And with him? Him of all people! What was is, Zuk? What does he have that I don't? Answer me, Kazuki! KAZUKI!"..._

**Kazuki squeezed his already closed eyes tighter. He moaned and stirred in the bed.**

"**Hey! Guys, he's awake!"Yomi's face appeared above Kazuki and he blinked. The room was so bright, everything was in pastel tones and there was a faint beeping to his right. He coughed and felt a warm hand on his arm.**

"**Where…where am I?"**

"**You're in the hospital. Do you remember what happened?"**

"**I remember being upset and…Byou! Oh god, where's Byou? Ow, shit my wrist! What the hell happened? Where is Byou?" A firm hand grabbed his shoulder. He looked up, tears running down his cheeks.**

"**I'll leave you two alone." Yomi stood and left the room before Kazuki could stop him.**

"**H..hey, Byou." Byou leaned down, brushed some hair away from Kazuki's face and kissed his forehead. Kazuki closed his eyes. Byou didn't pull away. But rested his forehead on Kazuki's, his nose brushing Kazuki's temple.**

"**What were you thinking, Zuki?" he heard a quiver in Byou's voice. "Why would you do this?"**

"**What? Byou, what did I do? I don't remember." Byou lifted his head and looked down on Kazuki who raised his hand and smoothed it through Byou's hair.**

"**Zuk, you tried to kill yourself."**

**Yomi fidgeted in the waiting room when Shou walked in. Yomi jumped up, excited to see him, but his face fell when he saw Ruki walking behind Shou.**

"**Ruki…when did you get back?"**

"**Hey, Yomi." Ruki extended his arm for a hug. Yomi stared for a moment, then accepted what was offered to him. "I don't want this to be awkward, so I'm just gonna go see Kazuki, then I'll leave."**

"**No, no it's fine. Uhm, Byou's in there now."**

"**I'll just wait outside the door. I think you two have some things to discuss. It was good to see you both." Ruki walked out of the room. Shou turned to stop him but he was already gone. He felt the same longing that he felt the first time Ruki left him. Slowly, his head turned towards Yomi.**

"**Hey." Was all Shou managed to get out. It didn't matter. Yomi threw himself into Shou's arms and embraced him with extreme force. Shou grunted from the impact.**

"**Why did you do that to me, Shou?"**

**Riku woke up, Jui next to him face down on the bed, the tan sheet lay smoothly across his lower back, exposing his shoulders. Riku rolled over and kissed between Jui's shoulder blades, allowing his face to linger on Jui's warm skin.**

**Jui inhaled deeply and cracked his eyes open.**

"**Riku?"**

"**Hm?" Riku rubbed his face up and down Jui's back.**

"**Is…" he grunted and rolled his shoulders, "Is your phone ringing?" Riku grumbled and started digging through the pile of clothes next to the bed. Jui propped himself up on his elbows and rubbed his eyes. He was sore, but it didn't matter. It was worth it to him.**

"**Hey, babe? You having trouble finding your phone?"**

"**Oh, shut up, it's here somewhere. It stopped buzzing and now I can't find it. " Jui laughed and rolled over onto his back and stretched.**

"**Oh my god!"**

"**What? Whats wrong?" Jui sat up and pressed his bare chest against Riku's back, looking over his shoulder.**

"**It' Kazuki. He's in the hospital."**

**Chapter 14...**

**The rain was falling hard against the windshield. The wipers moved violently on the glass to clear away the water. Jui watched the water move rhythmically back and forth. It seemed hypnotizing. The car jerked forward as Riku pressed on the gas. Jui was snapped out of his trance and he blinked.**

"**Anything wrong, Jui? You seem a little distant." Jui sighed and adjusted his scarf. Riku turned his head towards Jui but kept his eyes on the road. "Jui?"**

"**I can't help but think that what happened to Kazuki was my fault."**

"**What? Why would you think that? You and Kazuki haven't been together for years!"**

"**I know, but we didn't leave on good terms and…Riku, pull over."**

"**What's the matter?"**

"**I need to confess something."**

"**Can't this wait until we get to the hospital?"**

"**No. I think it's best to tell you now, to avoid any kind of awkwardness when we get there." Riku agreed, although slightly suspicious. He pulled over, the slapping of the wiper blades breaking the silence.**

"**I lied to you today."**

"**What? About what?" Jui sighed. He pushed himself up and positioned himself to face Riku.**

"**I didn't have errands to run."**

"**Are you kidding? Then where the hell were you?" Riku was trying to remain calm, but he could hear himself sounding aggressive.**

"**I went to Kazuki's."Riku opened his mouth. "But before you say anything, let me tell you why." He closed his mouth and cocked his head to the side, looking at Jui with intensity. "Yomi texted me earlier. He was really upset, his boyfriend and he had a big fight. He sent me the address where I could find him. I swear to you, Riku, I had no idea it was Kazuki's house, honest!"**

"**Yomi? That bastard! I never would have expected something like this from him…"**

"**Oh, Riku, stop it! Yomi is too innocent to do something like that! He's my friend, Riku. Plus he has no idea what Kazuki's and my past was. If he did he never would has asked me to meet him there."**

"**Ok, if you say so." Riku exhaled heavily and stared ahead. Jui watched him, waiting for him to say something. Anything.**

"**I believe you. And I thank you for telling me. I respect that." Jui let out a sigh of relief.**

"**Ok, then?" Riku smiled and put his hand on Jui's knee.**

"**Ok."**

**Byou stood outside the hospital smoking his last cigarette. He ashed and took a long inhale, holding it in until it hurt. He blew out a long stream of smoke and ashed again.**

**Ruki came out and patted the pockets of his jeans, then of his jacket, brow furrowed. Byou held out his lighter.**

"**Thanks." Ruki held his cigarette to the flame. "What a mess, huh?" Byou remained silent and took another long drag from his withering cigarette. Ruki shed his hard exterior and took Byou's body into his small embrace. Byou buried his face in Ruki's shoulder and let everything out. Everything he had bottled up for years came out on Ruki.**

**Ruki closed his eyes and flicked his cigarette. He patted Byou's back.**

**Yomi paced the waiting room floor.**

"**Yomi, sit down! You're making me nervous."**

"**Sorry." Yomi sat down in the chair next to Sou and sighed, his foot started tapping on the floor. Shou watched his leg move up and down. "So, are you…are you getting back together with Ruki?"**

"**No, absolutely not. He had his chance with me and he left me alone. I have you now." Shou took Yomi's hands into his own, but Yomi pulled away.**

"**Why did you yell at me? Was it because of Ruki?" Shou had forgotten. If this incident had upset Yomi so much, how could he tell him why he had yelled at him? If yelling at him upset him like this, how could he tell Yomi the truth? He opened his mouth to speak when Riku walked in.**

"**Hey, Yomi!" he ran over to Yomi and hugged him. "How is he?"**

"**He's stable, sleeping now we can't disturb him." Jui walked in and brushed his blonde hair from his face,**

"**Jui!" Yomi embraced him. "Thank you so much for helping me earlier." Shou choked on his coffee. "OH, Jui, this is Shou I was telling you about. Shou, this is Jui, Jui this is Shou." Jui and Shou stared at each other in shock. "You two know each other?" Jui squeezed free from Yomi's grip and stumbled backwards.**

"**No…"he muttered. "It can't be!"**

**Chapter 15...**

**Kazuki shot up in bed gasping for breath. The IV yanked from his arm and he cried out in pain. He crumpled forward so his forehead touched his feet that were crossed in front of him. The door flew open and Byou ran in.**

"**What's wrong? I heard you scream!"**

"**Get the nurse, please…"Kazuki held his arm where the needle had torn out. Blood stained the bandages on his wrist and he clenched his eyes closed. The nurse came in and fixed his arm, changed his bandages, and gave him a new IV. He sniffed and flopped back onto his pillow.**

"**Nurse?" she turned towards him.**

"**Yes, hun?"**

"**Is there any way you can turn off that machine? The beeping keeps giving me nightmares."**

"**Sorry, sweetie. We have to leave it on. I can give you a sleeping pill if-"**

"**NO!" Byou interrupted. "No pills." The nurse nodded and left the room.**

"**Byou, I can't sleep! Help me to sleep! Don't leave me, not again..please, please, please, please…" his voice became weak and a tear freed itself from his eyelash.**

**Byou took Kazuki's hand and kissed it. He then kissed his nose, his eyelids, his forehead. Kazuki felt the moisture linger.**

"**I'm not going anywhere. Here," Byou pulled his iPod out of his pocket and gently put the earbuds into Kazuki's ears. He quietly pulled his chair closer to the bed. He sat down and stroked Kazuki's smooth cheek with the back of his hand until he fell asleep.**

**An hour later Ruki cautiously opened the door of Kazuki's room and tip toed in, carefully closing the door behind him. He turned towards the bed. Byou was sitting with his head on Kazuki's hand, his eyes closed, his face painted with an expression of concern. They were both asleep. Ruki smiled. He jotted down a little note and slid it under Byou's limp hand which rested on Kazuki's stomach.**

"**Till next time, cousin."**

**Chapter 16...**

**Yomi turned from Shou, to Jui, to Riku. Riku was just as confused as Yomi. He walked to Jui and placed his hand on his shoulder.**

"**Ju? You ok?" Jui moved his head to Riku but kept his eyes fixed on Shou.**

"**I…uhm…"Jui stuttered and blinked repeatedly, not believing what he was seeing.**

**Shou cleared his throat and stood up, shaking. Yomi looked at him with apprehension.**

"**Shou, what the hell is going on here? What is with you two?" Yomi motioned to Jui. Riku interjected.**

"**Jui's probably just upset about Kazuki, right? They're good friends. Right , Ju?"**

"**No, no…"Jui leaned on the doorway and put his hand on his forehead, his light blonde hair cascaded over his slender hand.**

"**Awe, Jui! It's ok! Kazuki is fine, I was just in there with him and the nurse said—"**

"**It's not that! Oh god, I need some air!" Jui started to leave the room.**

"**Ju, it's ok!" Yomi and Riku tried to calm him down. They patted his shoulders and tried to give him hugs.**

"**STOP!"Jui threw his arms out, pushing away Riku and Yomi. They stood back in alarm. Jui gave one last look in Shou's direction, and then ran out of the room.**

**Yomi and Riku turned to Shou. He was trembling as he stumbled back onto his chair.**

"**Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit…" he buried his face in his hands, his fingers pushing through his long bangs.**

"**Shoouu? What the hell—"**

"**It wasn't supposed to be like this!" Shou yelled out and slammed his hands onto his knees. A nurse stuck her head in the door and loudly shushed them. Yomi glared at her, sticking out his tongue as she walked away.**

"**What? Huh? What wasn't supposed to be this way?" Riku extended his arm towards Shou. Shou slapped his hand away.**

"**Don't touch me, don't fucking touch me!" Shou shot up from his seat and walked to the corner of the room. He stood with one hand on the wall and the other rested on his hip.**

"**Sh…Shou?" Yomi was becoming concerned. He wanted to comfort Shou, but he was afraid to upset him even more. He didn't want to be yelled at again.**

**Shou raised his arm towards Riku.**

"**I'm sorry."**

"**Hey, man, it's ok. We're all upset about this."**

"**No, it's not that. I'm sorry for…for…god," Shou ran out of the room.**

"**Shou!"Yomi lunged after him but Riku held him back.**

"**Let him go. He needs to calm down."**

**Jui bumped into someone as he ran out of the hospital door. He turned to apologize, tears in his eyes.**

"**S…sorry, sir, I'm sorry."**

"**Hey, dude, it's alright. Whoa, you ok?"**

"**Uhuh," he sniffed, "My friend, he's, ah, he's hurt…"**

"**Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Mine too. Well, he's not really a friend. Technically I've never met the man, but he's close to someone I know. I feel like I know him from the letters I've been sent." He puffed his cigarette, "I'm Ruki, by the way. You smoke?"**

"**Jui, yeah thanks."**

**Byou lifted his head and looked around the room, they were still alone. All alone. Just the two of them. Byou smiled at the thought of it. He sighed and rubbed his eyes. Carefully, he adjusted himself in his seat so he could lay his head down and still see Kazuki's face. He looked so peaceful when he slept.**

**He saw the note on Kazuki's stomach, he raised his eyebrow. He squinted and picked up the note, coughing lightly to avoid waking up Kazuki.**

_Dear Byou,..._

_I wish I could have stayed longer. It's been too long since you and I have seen each other, but it seems my need to return to this place was all in vain. My future does not exist here. I must leave and find a better place to be. Alone. I am destined to be alone..._

_I am leaving tonight. It would be better for the both of us if we didn't say goodbye. It would be easier. But if you decide to break the rules, which I know you love to do, you can find the address to my hotel on the back of this note..._

_You were always close to me, Byou. I am happy for you and Kazuki. I hope to meet him some day. He sounds like a wonderful person. I wish you both the best in your lives..._

_Love, your cousin,..._

_Ruki..._

**Chapter 17**

**Kazuki slowly opened his eyes, blinking to adjust to the light. He took Byou's headphones out of his ears and looked around. He saw Byou pulling on his coat and scarf.**

"**Mm..Byou, where are you going, hun?" Byou grabbed his keys and walked over to Kazuki.**

"**My cousins in town. I wanna stop by and see him." Kazuki propped himself up on his pillow, grunting from pain.**

"**Something hurting? Do you need a nurse?" Byou rushed back to Kazuki's side.**

"**No, no. It's just these beds, they're uncomfortable. You said your cousin? Ruki, right? See if he could come visit. I'd like to meet him before he leaves." Byou smiled.**

"**Ok." He bent down and kissed Kazuki. "I'll be back as soon as possible."**

"**That's alright, Byou, take your time! You haven't seen each other in a while. Take some time to catch up."Kazuki held out his arms like a child begging for his mother to hold him. Byou laughed out of a crooked smile and embraced Kazuki.**

**Kazuki didn't want to let go. Byou had changed. He was kinder, sweeter, more gentle, and more caring. Kazuki liked it. He didn't want the feeling to go away.**

**Byou took Kazuki's face into his hands and pulled it towards his own. His lips were slightly parted whe he locked them with Kazuki's. Kazuki closed his eyes and slinked his arms around Byou's neck. He moaned and Byou pulled away. Kazuki opened his eyes half way.**

"**I'll be back later," Byou whispered. He kissed Kazuki one last time. Kazuki swore he felt Byou's warm tongue in his mouth.**

"**Don't forget to ask Ruki about stopping by here sometime." Kazuki waved to Byou as he walked out the door.**

**Yomi stood in the doorway of the waiting room, staring down the hallway. Riku stood next to him, watching the Tokyo lights link spontaneously out the window. Yomi's head dropped. What had just happened? He tapped his hand rhythmically against his thigh and sighed. He turned to Riku.**

"**I need to go find Shou."**

"**I need to find Jui."**

**They nodded at each other and left the waiting room.**

**Jui blew out the smoke he had been holding in and flicked his cigarette. It was a pleasant evening. The temperature was at the point where you could wear a coat or not and still be comfortable. Jui nodded his head to Byou who went trotting past to his car.**

**The sliding glass door of the hospital entrance squeaked open. Jui heard footsteps approaching and they stopped close behind. He angled his head to get a glimpse at who was there. He jumped and turned around to find it was Shou.**

"**Oh god…"**

"**What the hell? You and Yomi? Shit, man. What are we gonna do?" Jui began to panic, causing him to drop his cigarette.**

"**I…I don't know. Riku and I just came to terms with things and-"**

"**You told Riku?"**

"**Well, yeah! Why wouldn't I?"**

"**Shit…I don't know. I have no idea what to do about Yomi. I was hoping to just let it go and then YOU showed up again. I mean, what am I supposed to do now? Fuck!" Shou screamed the last word and walked in a small circle, his chin pointed towards the clear sky. The reds, blues, and yellows of the fluorescent Tokyo skyline illuminated their faces. A slight breeze swam through their hair.**

"**I wish I could help you, Shou, but I don't know how. If I used to think I would have jumped off a bridge before I would have had the courage to tell Riku."**

"**But you did tell Riku. How? How did you muster up the courage to tell him?"**

"**To tell you the truth, Shou, I actually stood on the railing of the Rainbow Bridge. I was going to jump. You know what stopped me? As soon as I lifted my leg to pull myself over, I received a text from Riku. The most innocent text, just asking where I was and asking if I was ok. At that moment an image flashed into my head. An image of Riku crying. Crying because of my selfishness. I then realized how much he loved me. And it was because he loved me that I knew we could get through this. I knew we could make it through." Shou's eyes fogged up and he hung his head low.**

"**I would have jumped. Why? I love Yomi so much but I can't stop hurting him!" he burst into tears, "you know what, Jui? I would have jumped. I'll STILL jump!" Shou began to run. He stopped to yell back, "Teall Yomi I'll love him forever!"**

"**NO!" Jui started to run after him when Yomi came outside.**

"**Hey, Ju. Riku's inside looking for you. Have you seen Shou?"**

"**Oh god, Yomi! Go after him quick! He ran that way! Oh, Yomi he's going to jump off the Rainbow Bridge!"**

"**WHAT!" Yomi gasped and ran in the direction Jui had pointed.**

"**Hurry!"**

**Byou pushed his way through the swinging door of the Imperial Hotel. He removed him facemask and sunglasses. Something he learned from Ruki, wear sunglasses when it's dark out and people will know to leave you alone.**

**Byou fiddled with the note in his pocket. He pulled it out, his lips mouthing the room number so he could memorize it. He walked to the front desk to ask which floor Ruki's room was on.**

**The desk clerk was obviously new. She began to type the number into the computer as she looked over the rim of her thick framed glasses. Her name tag read Chihiro. Byou read the tag many times as he waited for her to find the information he sought. He began to drum on the counter with his hands.**

"**Fourth floor, sir." Byou gave a condescending smile as he backed away.**

"**Thank you."**

**A father and his small son rode in the elevator with Byou. The little boy had a lollipop that had turned his whole mouth blue. Byou looked down to see the boy staring at him intently. He made faces at the boy to try and get him to smile. The boy's body shook with laughter. Byou winked at him as the elevator door closed, making the little boy disappear.**

**Byou walked down the long hallway, looking at each door carefully. When he'd reached the right door he felt short of breath. He attempted to regain his composure as he raised his hand to knock on the door.**

**Chapter 18**

**Yomi went tearing frantically down the streets of Tokyo. People yelled and snarled at him as he shoved his way down the crowded sidewalk. He could feel the tears streaming down his face as he ran. He called out Shou's name over and over in hopes of a response. He heard nothing and began to panic. He reached the edge of the bridge and didn't see anyone there. Yomi let out a loud cry.**

"**Shou!" he screamed. He started running again, tripping over his own feet as he did so. His throat felt raw from calling out Shou's name, but he continued to yell.**

**Finally, he saw him. He stood bent over, his arms crossed on the railing, his head buried in them. Yomi could hear his sobs from where he was standing. They came from deep within his chest and he began to cough violently.**

**Yomi let out a small sigh of relief to see Shou alive, but he was still concerned for his mental and emotional stability. He took one step closer to him, cautiously, for he didn't want to startle Shou. He was standing dangerously close to the edge.**

"**Shou?" Shou lifted his head, but he only gazed forward.**

"**Y…Yomi?" he turned towards the sound of Yomi's voice. The water and the passing cars made it hard to hear.**

"**SHOU! What are you doing?"**

"**Yomi, please. Let me be. Your life would be better off without me. I've lied to you, I've hurt you…" he turned back to the water below, gasping the rail firmly. " You deserve better than me, Yomi!"**

"**Shou , please don't do this! Whatever you have done we can work through, just come down off the railing!"Yomi was inching closer to Shou as they talked.**

"**Don't come any closer, Yomi! Please, just go! Find someone who will love you and treat you with the respect you deserve." Shou stepped up another bar on the railing and Yomi took a few steps forward and burst into tears. "Yomi, I will love you forever!" Shou let go of the railing.**

**Byou lowered his hand from the door. Maybe Ruki was right. Maybe it would be better to not say goodbye. Ruki was like a brother to Byou. They were close all through childhood, teen years, and adulthood. Then one day, Ruki left. Nobody knew why. All Ruki would say about it was it was something he had to do.**

**Byou sighed and turned to leave when the door opened.**

"**You always lived life on the edge, Byou. But in a situation like this, you're prepared to just walk away? Highly disappointing." Byou's eyes blurred over with tears. He had missed Ruki more than he thought. Everything about him he had missed. He missed his smile, his laugh, his hugs, his comforting ways, his gentleness. But mostly, Byou had missed the sound of Ruki's voice.**

**Byou whirled around and almost tackled Ruki. Ruki stumbled backwards from the force. Byou was considerably taller than he was so the embrace threw him off balance.**

"**You gonna come in?"Byou released Ruki and the entered the hotel room. "Don't mind the mess, I'm in the middle of packing."**

"**Why are you leaving again?" Ruki stopped and hung his head, exhaling heavily.**

"**Byou, there's nothing for me here. I thought I had someone, someone to come home to, but it seems as if he's moved on."**

"**You wouldn't stay for me?" Ruki moved towards Byou.**

"**I have no place to stay. No place will hire me with the kind of reputation I have. Besides, you have, oh, sorry I forget his name sometimes." Byou opened his mouth to assist his cousin's memory. Ruki raised his hand to Byou. "No don't tell me! Ka…ka..damn..there's a 'Z' in it..Kazuki?"**

"**Yes! Kazuki. But, Ruki, you don't understand the different kind of love that I miss receiving from you. I miss that brotherly love. I sometimes crave it. I miss you!" Ruki sighed. There was a long silent pause, people outside laughed loudly. Finally, Ruki spoke.**

"**I'll think about it."**

"**About what?"**

"**Staying."**

"**OH GOD NO!" Yomi ran to the railing in time to grab Shou's wrist. Yomi heard Shou's shoulder pop and Shou cried out from the pain. The tears of fear blinded Yomi, but he kept his sights on Shou. Yomi hollered for help. Suddenly, an arm appeared on Shou's other wrist. Yomi turned to see Jui standing there, arm extended, blonde hair blowing ferociously in the wind.**

"**Shou! What the hell? Didn't you listen to a think I was saying back there?"**

"**Let me go! Let me fucking go!"**

"**No! Now you shut up and listen to me!" Yomi had never heard Jui raise his voice before. He stood, holding Shou with all his might, watching the situation unfold.**

"**I heard you, Shou. Right before you jumped. Yomi told you he was willing to work out all your problems with you. He's helped in the past, why won't you trust him now? You then told him you would love him forever! So why the hell did you jump?" Shou hung his head and began to weep. "Shou, before we pull you up, I'm going to tell Yomi something you should have told him a long time ago!"**

"**NO! Please, I'd rather die!" Yomi looked from Shou to Jui, his face showed confusion.**

"**Yomi?" Jui yelled over the sound of the traffic, "Shou and I slept together." Yomi's hand slipped on Shou's wrist. "If it makes you feel any better, as I assume it probably won't, I had no idea he was with you! I'm sorry. Shou is sorry. You can hate me, but please, don't take it out on Shou. Now, help me pull him up!" Yomi pulled with extreme force, causing Shou to cry out from the pain in his shoulder. Shou's body slid over the railing and into Yomi's arms. Yomi pulled Shou back and slapped him in the face with all the energy he had left, then pulled him back into a strong embrace, crying into Shou's neck.**

"**Oh, he's asleep, Byou, I don't wanna wake him."**

"**Shut it, he begged to see you, you're gonna stay until he wakes up." Byou pulled off his coat and tossed it onto the foot of Kazuki's bed.**

"**He begged?"**

"**Reminded me three times from the bed to the door." Ruki laughed. "Shit, here, Ruk, sit over there. I gotta go take this call."**

"**Ok." Ruki walked to the far side of the room and sat on the chair next to Kazuki's bed. He heard Byou's voice say 'moshi moshi' as he walked out the door.**

**Kazuki's eyes shot open when the door closed. He shut them again and exhaled, rolling over to face Ruki. Ruki tilted his head and studied Kazuki's face. He smiled. Byou had done well. Kazuki seemed so innocent, his face seemed to have a radiant glow.**

**Kazuki opened his eyes and looked at Ruki. He didn't jump or even wonder who the person next to him was. He smiled.**

"**Ruki?"**

"**Yeah, you must be, damn, sorry."**

"**Kazuki," he laughed, "Byou always said you were never good with names."**

"**It's true. Byou talks about you in his letters so much that I feel as If I've known you my whole life."**

"**Same. I am so happy to finally meet you."**

"**The feeling is mutual." The corner of Ruki's mouth slanted upward as he looked on the childlike face laying before him. He hoped one day to have someone like Kazuki. He was yet another thing that Ruki envied Byou for.**

"**You come alone?" Kazuki joked.**

"**Ha, no, Byou had a phone call."**

"**He's a popular guy." Just then, Byou slowly entered the room. "There he is! Hey, hun! Thanks for bringing Ruki to see me. We were just talking about y—everything ok?"**

"**Ruki, I need you to remain calm."**

"**Why? What's happened?"**

"**It's Shou."**

"**What? What happened to him?"**

"**He tried to jump off the Rainbow Bridge."**

**Chapter 19...**

**Ruki's eyes widened. Had he caused Shou to do this? All of the memories that Ruki had shared with Shou rushed into his mind in a split second.**

"**Ruki?" Byou snapped his fingers in front of Ruki's face. "Ruki!" he jumped. "I'll drive you to him if you wa—"**

"**No. He needs Yomi now. He doesn't need me anymore."**

"**What are you saying? Please tell me this isn't your decision!" Ruki looked at his shoes, afraid to make eye contact with Byou.**

"**Byou, I love you dearly, but Shou was the only reason for my return to Tokyo. I will visit you as much as possible and I will continue to write, but please, it's best if I just go." Kazuki slowly pulled off the covers and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.**

"**Come here." He held an arm out towards Ruki who looked at him skeptically. "C'mon!" Ruki stood and walked to Kazuki. He took Ruki into his arms and held him tight. "Do what you think is best for yourself, Ruki." He whispered. Ruki squeezed his eyes shut. He would not cry.**

"**Take care of Byou for me. He may seem tough on the outside, but inside he's as fragile as a child."**

"**I will." With that, Ruki walked towards the door and stopped next to Byou.**

"**Don't I get a hug?" he joked. Byou smiled, tears in his eyes, as he wrapped his arms around his cousin.**

"**Be strong, Byou."**

"**You too." Ruki patted Byou on the cheek and left the room. "Ruk? Can…can I drive you to your hotel?" Ruki smirked.**

"**Sure."**

"**Zuki, I'll be right back."**

"**That's fine. It was wonderful to finally meet you, Ruki! Come visit us soon!"**

"**We'll see."Byou pulled the door shut behind him as he and Ruki left the room.**

"**How could you, Shou? Why? Why, why, why…" Yomi and Shou sat in each other's embrace crying on each other's shoulders. Jui stood next to them looking down on the water as cars continued to pass them. He remembered when he was in this situation. He was glad that Riku wasn't there to stop him. He felt like a stronger person for talking himself down.**

**Yomi pushed Shou away, still holding his shoulders. He looked at him, studying his face, trying to understand him, trying to figure him out.**

"**Shou, what did I do wrong? Was there something I did or didn't do? What could I have done to cause you to wander like this?" Shou's head hung low, his chin touching his chest. The tears that were falling fell from his eyelashes and off of his nose.**

"**Yomi, you do me no wrong. You've helped me through so much. It's just, ever since Ruki left I've felt so…empty, like I don't know what I want." Shou sobbed as he spoke. "I just, I just know that I want you, but all I have done since the day I've met you is hurt you!"**

**Yomi pulled Shou back into his arms, rubbing his back, stroking his hair. He looked up to Jui and sighed.**

"**One second, Shou. I'll be right back." Yomi whispered. Shou sniffed and nodded, falling limply out of Yomi's grasp. Yomi stood up and approached Jui. He turned his yead towards Yomi, but quickly looked back towards the water beneath them. "Jui?" Jui grabbed the railing and his shoulders hunched, his head hung low between his arms. Yomi knew Jui hated it when people saw him upset. He always tried to hide his emotions.**

"**Yomi…I am so sorry." Jui's voice was quivering. Yomi placed his hand on Jui's neck causing him to turn and fall into Yomi's embrace.**

"**I forgive you." He pulled away, one arm still around Jui's waist as he turned to Shou who was crumpled on the pavement. "Both of you. It will be hard to get over, I know. But I am willing to try if you are, Shou. What do you think."**

"**Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes…"Shou crawled to Yomi's feet and hugged his legs.**

"**Ok, ok. C'mon, let's get you to the hospital. We need to get your shoulder fixed." Yomi and Jui pulled Shou off the ground. "Then we'll go home, get some sleep, and try to forget this mess." Jui pulled out his phone and called Byou. Yomi turned to him.**

"**What are you doing?"**

"**I ran the whole way here then pulled him up. I don't feel like walking back." Yomi found some part of him that wanted to laugh. So did Shou. All three of them sat on a bench and waited for Byou to pick them up.**

**Chapter 20...**

**The next morning Ruki stood on the curb, his bags packed next to him. The sun was rising over the skyline of Tokyo. He smiled. He would sort of miss this city and all its beauty. He pulled out his cigarettes, blocking the flame of the lighter from a passing breeze. He exhaled blowing a long train of smoke from his lungs. A woman came and stood a few feet from him, he looked at her out of the corner of his eye.**

"**Dammit!" her hair fell in front of her face as she dug through her purse. She flipped her head towards Ruki, causing her hair to fly onto her back. "Excuse me, hey, sorry, but,uh, do you happen to have a lighter on ya?"**

"**Yeah!" Ruki dug into his pocket and fished out his lighter. He ignited the flame and lit her cigarette for her.**

"**Thanks." She took a long drag from her LARK ultra menthol. "You from around here?" she exhaled.**

"**Used to be. Came back for a visit, but it was a mistake…"he paused, she was looking at him intently, "Eh, you don't wanna hear my life story."**

"**Well, if you're in no hurry, my flight was delayed four hours. You wanna grab some coffee in the hotel café? It'll make you feel better."**

"**What makes you think I feel bad?" she raised her eye brown and her large eyes peered at him over her dark aviators.**

"**You have sad eyes." Ruki paused, taking a good look at her for the first time. She was one of the most beautiful creatures he had ever seen. It had been a long time since he was attracted to a woman. Maybe talking to someone of her beauty and charm would take his mind off Shou.**

"**Yeah, yeah sure coffee sounds great."**

"**Good! Cause, lemme tell ya, I could really use something to wake me up. You don't wanna hear about my night. Good god what a party." She whistled as she pushed the door to the hotel open, dragging her large bag behind her. Ruki smiled. She was so full of life. He wondered what was really motivating him to sit with her.**

**Ruki sat across the table from the woman. He was trying desperately to suppress his laughter. She was sitting, her chin almost on the table blowing on her coffee. Her eyes seemed crossed as she gazed into the brown steaming liquid. She took a sip and sat back.**

"**So," she licked the spoon and placed in on the coffee saucer, "What's this story you got?" Ruki put down his drink and sighed.**

"**Wow, where to begin?"**

"**At the beginning. Always a good place to start." She smirked at him over her mug as she raised it to her mouth. She sipped it delicately. She was definitely a smart ass and Ruki liked it.**

"**Ok, at the beginning." He laughed. He started with his relationship with Shou and how he had left for personal reasons. He then returned, only to come back and not have Shou in his life anymore. He could feel tears welling in his eyes as he told her about the night before. She nodded, drinking her coffee.**

"**Well then, "she said after the story had finished, "that's some story you got there. So, I gotta ask you," she took another drink, "why did you leave if you were scared to lose someone you cared so much about?"**

"**It's personal."**

"**Well shit dude, you've told me this much already. And it's not like you'll ever see me again."**

"**Won't I?" She laughed at him.**

" **You don't even know my name, and I don't even know yours." She started to rise from the table.**

"**Ruki."**

"**Ok," she sat back down, "Waka. My name is Waka."**

**Waka. She was perfect.**

**Shou slept the whole night, exhausted from what had happened. His eyes were dried out and he could barely keep them open. Yomi on the other hand, didn't sleep at all. He lay in bed all night, just watching Shou sleep. The whole time he cried and hated himself for letting Shou wander so far from him.**

**Yomi brushed the hair from Shou's face over and over, touching his face, admiring his beauty. Shou grunted and moved closer to Yomi. Yomi teared up. He slowly and smoothly, so as not to wake him, pulled Shou's head to his chest, kissing his hair. Shou moved his arm over Yomi loosely, smacking his lips together.**

"**Shou? You awake?"**

"**Mmm" Shou moaned.**

"**Shou, can you promise me something?" Shou lifted his head, touching his nose to Yomi's chin.**

"**What?"**

"**Just, just promise me you'll never do any of this again. Promise me you'll always love me." Shou pulled himself up to Yomi's eye level. He put his hand on Yomi's face and kissed his lips softly.**

"**Yomi, I can and will promise to love you always and forever. And one more thing."**

"**What?"**

"**I am…So sorry…"**

**Chapter 21...**

"_I'll be back soon. Don't forget to pick up—"..._

"_He didn't go to school today."..._

"_What? Why the hell not?"..._

"_He aint feelin' good."..._

"_Well, that's never stopped you from sending him before! What made you change your mind?"..._

"_Shut up, bitch! Who the hell do you think you are? Grab me a beer before you leave."..._

"_Who the hell do I think I am? Who the hell do you think YOU are? It's 9a.m. get your own fucking beer, I have to go to work."..._

"_Useless whore."..._

"_Daddy?"..._

"_What?"..._

"_I…I…"..._

"_Get it out, you shit hole, I'm trying to watch tv!"..._

"_I,,,I wanna go to school today,,,"..._

"_Tough tittys! I got you for the whole weekend, and boy, are we gonna have some fun!"..._

"_Daddy, don't hurt me anymore, please…"..._

"_Shut the fuck up and get me a beer, you whiney brat!"..._

"_But, daddy…"..._

"_Get me a fucking beer you little piece of shit!"..._

"_No."..._

"_What? What did you say to me?"..._

"_I said no. every time you drink you hurt me. I don't wanna get hurt anymore."..._

"_I don't give a fuck what you think! Now, you get me a fucking beer before I rip your face off!"..._

"_No…mm mm… I won't do it."..._

"_Then you best start running boy, cuz things around here about to get real nasty!"the father reached for the boys chest and tore his shirt, scratching his skin and causing him to bleed. The boy would have cried out from the pain, but he was more focused on escaping..._

_His small legs couldn't run fast enough and his father soon had a firm hold on him..._

"_No! let me go!" the boy kicked and screamed the whole way up the stairs, trying to free his body from his father's grasp. His father threw him roughly onto the bed, locked the doors, and closed the curtains..._

"_You know what to do, boy. Take off your pants. I said take them off!" he screamed at the boy as he cried out..._

_The boy cried uncontrollably as his father undid the snap on his pants. He wasn't sure what happened or how, but the boy somehow ended up on his stomach, his father heavy on top of him. He tried calling out but he couldn't feel and air in his lungs. He could feel his father lunging inside of him. He closed his eyes and let it happen. There was nothing else he could do..._

_He father left the bedroom door open when he was finished, and the boy watched over his shoulder as his father descended the stair case. He cried into his pillow for hours, feeling the blood dampen the sheets around his legs. He had to leave. But where would he go? His best friend's house. He always felt safe there..._

_Slowly, he pulled himself up and dragged himself to the shower. Rinsing himself off, he continued to cry. After his shower, he went to call his friend..._

"_Hello, Ma'am, may I speak to your son please?"..._

"_Sure, hun. TAKANORI! Telephone!"..._

"_Ok, mom! I'll get it up here!"the boy could hear his friends voice yell from a distance. "Hello, Takanori speaking."..._

"_Hey, Ruki, it's me."..._

"_Shou?"..._

**Shou's eyes flew open. He was panting as he lay on his back, drenched in sweat. Yomi was laying with his back to Shou, breathing lightly. Shou slowly moved his hand to his chest and felt the scars his father had left. He closed his eyes and shuddered. What had brought back these memories?...**

**He rolled onto his side and pressed his body hard against Yomi's. the yellow light if the dawn cascaded softly through the curtains. Shou held Yomi tight as he began to cry,...**

**Yomi, still asleep, rolled over to face Shou, smacking his lips. He inhaled deeply as he pushed his arm over Shou's waist. Shou pulled away, sat on the edge of the bed, and burst into tears,...**

**-**********************-...**

**Byou turned from the desk to face Kazuki who was sitting across the room. Byou rolled his eyes and Kazuki laughed, covering his mouth with his hand. ...**

**Byou tapped his foot impatiently at the desk clerk. She was young, but slow and obviously very lazy. It appeared as though she hated her job, and Byou was close to making her day seem worse. All he wanted to do was take Kazuki home. The woman behind the desk chomped her gum as she talked on the phone with her friend. Kazuki was becoming restless, so he skipped over to Byou and leaned on his arm...**

**The woman behind the counter was becoming snippy with Byou as he calmly asked her to help him...**

"**Sir, I'm on the phone, see? You're just gonna have to wait like any other person."...**

"**Excuse me?"...**

"**Byou, I got this." Kazuki pushed Byou out of the way and leaned on the counter. He reached over and unplugged the phone. "Listen, lady, this man here has had some of the most traumatic couple days of all time. I just tried to fucking off myself, so don't you act like your life is miserable. Don't you DARE tell him to take a chill pill unless you too are willing to shove it up your epic ass! Now, please, give us the damn papers to sign so we can go home!" the woman's jaw dropped. She scoffed and pushed away from the desk to get the release papers. Kazuki glared at her as she walked away...**

"**What the hell was that?" Byou asked after the woman had left...**

"**Just a little something I learned from you." He smiled and patted Byou on the cheek. Byou kissed Kazuki on the forehead and rubbed his shoulders...**

"**Damn, I can't wait to get you home."...**

**-**********************-...**

"**Well, thanks for buying my coffee. I could have paid for it myself, ya know."Waka placed her sunglasses on her nose...**

"**Yeah, I know. That's why I bought it." He smiled. "So, where are you heading?"...**

"**To see the world, ha, I wish. No, I'm actually going to visit my uncle in Seoul. He just recently moved there,"...**

"**I wish I could have spent more time with you."...**

"**Oh?" she glanced at him over her glasses, "How so?"...**

"**Not sure. It's just, you make me feel…normal. Like I could never be hurt again. I know it's weird, cuz we just met, but…"...**

"**But?" Waka smirked...**

"**You made me feel wanted. And I haven't felt that way in a long time."...**

"**Awe, c'mon. Someone HAS to love you. Forget that Shou dude."...**

"**You don't understand. I did some pretty stupid things in my life. Ever since I bounced back from that, people have treated me differently. My own parents never even loved me. My only real friend is my cousin."...**

**Waka pouted. Her head low and tilted as if she were thinking about something. Suddenly, she swung her purse around and began to dig through it. After a few minutes, she pulled out her phone and handed it to Ruki...**

"**Number."...**

**-**********************-...**

**Riku held Jui close. He was still shaken up over what had happened to Shou. Riku stroked Jui's hair with one arm, and squeazed him tightly with the other...**

"**Jui, it's ok. Yomi is a strong person, and so is Shou. Together they will help each other through life."...**

"**I know, it's just," he sniffed, "I didn't know if I could talk him down or not. And when he jumped, I was just…I was just really scared, is all."...**

"**That's understandable! He's ok. Yomi's ok. You, you are ok. That's what matters most to me." Jui wiped away some tears and snuggled his cheek to Riku's shoulder. He sighed quietly as they both fell asleep...**

**Chapter 22**

**Ruki and Waka shared a cab to the airport. She jabbered the whole ride there, and he just sat and listened. He would have listened to her voice all day if she would let him.**

**Waka hopped in circles on the curb as Ruki paid the cab driver. She hummed a song to herself as she bounced. She was facing the building when she felt the strong force of a hand on her shoulder.**

"**Ssstop is."Ruki hissed. Waka gave him the stink eye then burst into fits of laughter. Ruki smiled at her and pulled her bags over his shoulder. "Which gate is yours?"**

"**Right over there." She pointed and began to skip in that direction. Ruki hung his head and laughed, following her slowly.**

"**Well," she said as they stood by the gate, "this is it. You have my number, so, ah, text or call when you get lonely."**

"**Will do." Ruki handed her her bag reluctantly. He didn't want her to leave. She made him feel complete. She made him feel numb. She started to walk away when he called out to her.**

"**Yeah?"she said, turning.**

"**I…I wanna tell you the rest of the story. I wanna tell you why I left. You should know."**

"**I gotta catch my flight! They've cancelled it too many times, I can't miss it again. Tell ya what,"**

***Now boarding Gate 17***

"**Call me tonight! We'll talk as long as you want, you can tell me everything!" people began to push past her. Ruki was disappearing from her sight and she was becoming lost in the crowd. She tried to shove her way through to get back to him. She finally reached him and threw her arms around his neck, holding him close. He closed his eyes and buried his face in her small shoulder.**

"**You wanna know something?"she whispered, "I think I kinda like you." She kissed him on the cheek and vanished into the crowd.**

**Ruki stood alone in the airport as the flight attendant closed the door to the plane. He felt a lump in his throat and tried to swallow it, but could feel tears filling his eyes.**

**Waka sat on the plane, looking out the window. A small glimpse of hope that Ruki might appear outside filled her mind. She heard the women behind her talking about how they had almost missed this flight and might have had to get the next flight out. Waka wished she had taken the next flight, just for one more moment with Ruki. She began to cry.**

"**Shou? You ok?" Yomi propped himself up in bed, his eyes blurry. "Awe, honey, why are you crying?" Shou sniffed and wiped the tears from his face.**

"**It's nothing. I just had a bad dream."**

"**You wanna talk about it?"**

"**Not really…just some old memories…"**

"_Shou, come on! Quit dragging your feet!"_

"_But, mom, I don't want to."_

"_You don't have a choice! It's your father's weekend to have you! Oh, honey, don't cry! Believe me, if I had the option to keep you forever I would, but we have to obey the court."_

"_I know, mom..but daddy, he…he…"_

"_What, sweetheart?"_

"_Nothing, you're just more fun than he is."_

"_Awe, thanks sweetie."_

"_Can't I spend the weekend with Ruki?"_

"_I don't know, baby. You'll have to ask your father when we get there, ok?" the drive from the school to his father's house was excruciating for Shou. He knew what his father wanted, he knew what would happen to him._

_Shou's mother stopped at the gas station to get soda and a snack for Shou. She knew exactly how to cheer him up._

"_I'll get you a slushie too. Get ya nice and hyper for your father." She laughed as she closed the car door and went inside. Shou knew the sugar wouldn't make him run faster from his father. He got caught every time. And every time he got hurt. A man walked past the car and Shou called out to him._

"'_Scuse me, sir? Hi, my mom needs directions somewhere, could you help us out?"_

"_Oh, sure, son. Where to?" Son…he had never had a man call him son before. Shou told the man exactly where he wanted to go, and the man told him how to get there._

"_Thank you, sir!"_

"_No problem, kiddo."_

_After the man had gone inside, Shou hopped out of the car, leaving a note for his mother on the front seat._

"_Sorry, Mom." He whispered, and he ran to where the man had given him directions._

"_Shou? What are you doing here?"_

"_Hey, Ruki. It's my dad's weekend."_

"_Understood. C'mon in. My mom's gonna make some sushi."_

"_TAKANORI! Hello, Shou. Taka, I need to talk with you in the kitchen, NOW!"Ruki's mom grabbed him roughly by the shoulder and pushed him into the kitchen. "What have I told you about bringing Shou here without his parents' permission?"_

"_Well, he had to have gotten here somehow, right?" Ruki's mom slapped him across the face with the back of her hand._

"_Don't use that tone with me!"she shoved him out of the kitchen, "Go to your room. And Shou, go home!" she slammed the kitchen door shut. The door opened again and she stuck her head out. "I never wanted you!" she screamed and slammed the door shut again. Ruki's chin quivered as he trudged up the stairs, rubbing his face. Shou followed him._

"_You ok?" Shou asked condescendingly as he closed the bedroom door behind him._

"_Yeah," he sniffed, "I'm used to it, but it still stings to hear, ya know?"_

"_Yeah, hey, you mind if I turn on the tv?"_

"_Go ahead." Ruki jumped onto his bed, hugging his pillow. Shou flipped on the tv as he fell onto Ruki's bed. The news was on, and Shou stopped to watch it._

_*A local woman was shot today at a local convenience store…*_

_Shou dropped the remote._

"_No…"_

_*reports are saying that the woman told the paramedics before she died that she had a son with her. All the police have been able to find was a note left in the car…*_

"_No…"_

_*Police have this man in custody…*_

_A picture appeared on the screen of the man Shou had asked for directions_

"_No…"_

**Byou repeated his favorite parts of Kazuki's rant the whole way home from the hospital. Byou started laughing as Kazuki stared out the window. He turned to Byou with a serious look on his face.**

"**Byou, I love you."**

"**I love you too, man."**

"**Let's make tonight special."**

"**Ok. Any suggestions?"**

"**Nothing too fancy. I want to keep everything simple."**

"**You got it."**

**Byou turned the key in the lock of the house. Pushing the door open, he was taken aback. The room looked immaculate. The floor was covered with lilies and lilacs, and incense was burning.**

"**W…what the hell is this?"**

"**Surprised? I did almost the exact same thing for Yomi a while back, so he just returned the favor. You like it?" Byou slammed the door shut behind him and stood in amazement. Kazuki walked around in front of Byou. He slung his arms around Byou's neck and kissed him, gently forcing his tongue into Byou's mouth. Byou inhaled deeply through his nose and placed his hand on Kazuki's hips, pushing his jeans down. Kazuki buried his face in Byou's neck, kissing and licking him. He wiggled out of his tight pants, still embracing Byou. Kazuki unbuttoned Byou's shirt and pulled it off his shoulders, restraining his arms behind him. Byou pulled away from Kazuki and slipped him shirt off over his head. Their heated bodies came together as Byou lowered Kazuki to the floor. Byou's knee's were on either side of Kazuki's thighs as he leaned down to kiss him. Kazuki slid his hand around Byou's neck and pulled his head down lower. He whispered in his ear.**

"**I love you, Byou.**

***Next flight for Seoul leaving in twenty minutes.***

**Chapter 23**

**Riku was in the kitchen fixing up a tray of food for Jui when the phone rang. Riku let it go to voicemail. If it was important the person would leave a message or call back. He carried the tray back the hallway and pushed open the bedroom door with his knee.**

"**Jui! Hey, you, wake up." Jui grunted and rubbed his eyes.**

"**What's this for?" he asked as he sat up.**

"**To eat. Honestly, do I really need a reason to spoil you?"Riku smiled at Jui and placed the tray on his narrow lap. "Eat up! I have a fun day planned for us."**

"**Why?"**

"**You want to know the truth? Well, here it is. I need to see you smile, Jui. Everything is right now, but you still aren't happy. I just want to see some joy in your life, is all." Jui lifted the tray and placed it next to him on the bed. He crawled to Riku and climbed into his lap, facing him. He brushed Riku's blonde hair from his face.**

"**You are the only source of joy I need in my life. As long as you are with me, I will be happy. I may not smile on the outside, but whenever you are with me, I smile inside. That's what counts"**

**Kazuki breathed heavily as Byou rolled off of him. He lay on the floor for a while, Byou panting next to him. They both had their hair wet and sticking to their faces. Kazuki coughed weakly and rolled over to snuggle with Byou's moist body. He grunted as he moved. He felt as though he should say something, but he knew Byou liked silence after love making. Byou reached over his head and pulled a blanket down off the couch. He wrapped Kazuki in it and carried his half asleep body up the stairs to the bedroom.**

**Waka stepped into the airport of Seoul and had been wandering around for hours. She didn't know what to do. There was a sinking feeling in her chest that made her feel uneasy. She dint want to see her uncle, but she did want to see her sister who had been living with their uncle for years. She sighed and walked outside, digging in her purse for her cigarettes.**

"**Dammit!" she had forgotten to buy a lighter at her hotel in Tokyo. She raised her head to see a flame in front of her.**

"**Hello, stranger. Still forgetting to carry a lighter?" the deep sultry voice made Waka turn to see who it was. Her mouth gaped open. She cleared her throat in an attempt to regain her composure.**

"**Are, ah, are you following me?"**

"**Eh, maybe. I was lonely." Waka smiled.**

"**Oh, Ruki, you silly boy I told you to call me." She bopped him on the forehead with the palm of her hand and he laughed. Waka bit her bottom lip and blinked. A small tear escaped from her eye and ran down her cheek. Ruki stopped it with his index finger. He wrapped his arms around her hips and lifted her up.**

"**You said back in Tokyo that you thought you liked me? She nodded. Ruki placed his lips gently onto hers, closing his eyes. "Well, miss, you made me fall head over heels in love with you." Waka smiled, and buried her face in Ruki's hair.**

"**Oh, who am I kidding? I love you too!" Ruki lowered her to the floor and kissed her again, just as lightly as before.**

"**Dinner?"**

"**Yes!"**

"**You wanna show me the city before then?"Waka giggled.**

"**Of course! Maybe we can get some coffee and talk. Just talk." Ruki would get what he wished for. He would get to listen to her voice all day.**

"**Yomi, has something ever happened to you where you felt it was your fault?"**

"**Well, just about everything that's happened in the past couple days, yeah."**

"**No, I mean something from your past. Like from your childhood."**

"**Shou, is there something you want to talk about?"**

"**Nah, don't worry about it,"**

"**I thought we agreed to be honest with each other."**

"**You honestly want to know?"**

"**Yes, please! You never talk to me about your problems until you're right on the brink of exploding. You need to stop bottling things up inside."**

"**Ok, but you have to agree to not be sappy and sympathetic about it." Yomi laughed.**

"**I promise." Shou sighed.**

"**Well, it all started with my parents divorce…"**

**Chapter 24...**

**Waka held Ruki by the arm as she led him through the streets of Seoul, pointing out things right and left. He wasn't really paying attention to what she pointed to, he was just happy to be with her again. He hugged her arm tightly as they walked. He listened to her voice and let it sink into his soul. Waka stopped walking and turned to Ruki, smiling...**

"**What?" he laughed...**

"**Would you wanna meet my family?"...**

"**Oh, yeah. You're here to see your uncle, right?"...**

"**Well, my sister. She's living with my uncle."Ruki thought for a moment...**

"**Yeah. Yeah I'd like to meet them." Waka squealed and jumped onto Ruki, causing him to stumble backwards. Elderly people passed them and scoffed. Ruki gave them an embarrassed smile. "Wanna go now?"...**

"**Uh, yeah, sure."...**

**A few hours past as Waka and Ruki ate lunch, then headed over to Waka's uncle's house. Ruki was feeling slightly nervous and didn't eat much...**

"**Uncle? Auntie? Sissy? Guess who?"...**

"**Oh my god, Waka!"...**

"**Hey, Jyou!" Waka embraced her sister. Ruki closed the door behind him, but didn't walk past the doorway...**

"**Who's you friend? O.M.G…is he your boyfriend?"...**

"**Well, yeah," Waka laughed, "I guess he is."...**

"**You guess?" Jyou leaned in to Waka and whispered to her out of the corner of her mouth. "Wow, girl he is cute!" she turned to him, tipping her head to the side. "C'mon in…"...**

"**Ruki."...**

"**Ruki! C'mon in, come meet the family! Any friend of Waka's is a friend of mine!" Jyou grabbed Ruki by the arm and dragged his towards the living room. Waka laughed at him as he stumbled past her...**

**Ruki was introduced to 3 different family members in less than ten seconds before Jyou pulled him off to show him the house...**

"**He seems charming. From what I saw of him anyway." Waka laughed...**

"**Hello, Auntie."...**

"**Hello, dear. How was your trip?"...**

"**Good! It was good. Jyou seems excited to have me home. Have you and uncle been depriving her of friends or something?"...**

"**No, she hasn't seen you in years dear, she's going to be happy to see you."...**

"**Well, I just hope she doesn't kill my boyfriend."Waka's aunt laughed...**

"**He is a stud. I have to ask you, where ever did you meet someone like him?"...**

"**I-"...**

"**Good lord!" Ruki came running down the stairs and stopped next to Waka, panting. Waka's aunt looked at him...**

"**You get the house tour in under thirty seconds?" Ruki looked at her, gasping for breath...**

"**What in the hell do you feed that girl?"Waka and her aunt burst out laughing...**

"**How about a glass of water, hun?"**

"**Please?"...**

"**Ok," she laughed, "follow me, dear, we can chat in the kitchen. Waka, honey, can you run upstairs and see what's become of your sister?" Waka nodded as Ruki was escorted into the kitchen. She smiled and trotted up the stairs...**

**-**********************-...**

**Shou started crying as he told the story of his mother's death. Yomi teared up as well and took Shou into his arms. He consoled him, stroking his hair and back...**

"**Shou, I had no idea. Why would you keep something like that inside you for so long?"...**

"**I don't know. Every day I think about how I might have been able to save her if I'd stayed in the car. I can't help but think it was all my fault."...**

"**But it wasn't! you had no idea of knowing what that man would do!"...**

"**Well, I still should have stayed! My mother's dying thoughts were worrying about me. She was always fucking worrying about me!"...**

"**Shou, it's ok. We can't change the past—"...**

"**I should have stayed. I should have gone inside with her. I should have died the same way she did. I should have died with her." Yomi slapped Shou across the face and grabbed his shoulders...**

"**I don't ever want to hear anything like that come from your mouth again, you hear me?" SHou burst into tears. "Do you hear me?" he nodded. "Ok, good. Come here." Yomi took Shou into his arms again...**

"**Yomi," Shou sobbed, "I need to know you'll always be there. I need to know you'll never hurt me." Yomi pulled away from Shou, still holding his shoulders, and looked straight into his eyes...**

"**I will always be here for you. I will always love you. You are the only thing in the entire world that matters to me. You, and only you." Shou gave a weak smile through his tears. Yomi hugged him as tightly as he could without injuring him...**

**-**********************-...**

"**Thank you, Riku. A walk was a very nice idea. It's a gorgeous day."...**

"**Isn't it though? I'm glad you like it. Oh, don't look now, but I think I see a smile on your face." Jui bit his lip and hung his head, his long blonde hair hiding his face. Riku sighed...**

"**Why, Jui? Why won't you show any kind of happiness, even for me? Why are you afraid to show emotion?"...**

"**I'm not."...**

"**You never fucking smile, Jui! You don't laugh with me anymore! You have no idea how much I crave your smile sometimes."...**

"**I'm sorry. I didn't know." Rikulooked away from Jui towards the lake they were passing. They were walking in silence for a while, when Jui started humming. Riku looked at Jui and smiled. He took hold of his hand and started singing the words to the tune Jui was humming.**

**Chapter 25...**

**Kazuki woke up in his room wrapped in a warm blanket. He grabbed the edge of it and brought it closer to his face. He lifted his head off the pillow and looked behind him. Byou was laying next to him facing the wall, the sheet loosely lying over his hips. Kazuki smiled. He rolled over and pulled the sheet up over Byou's shoulders and over himself. He placed the blanket he was wrapped in over the both of them as he pressed his body against Byou's. he was warm and his hair was still damp, stuck to his face. Kazuki brushed it off his neck, kissing his ear...**

**Byou was breathing lightly, his mouth slightly open. Kazuki watched him, a faint smile on his face. He would love Byou forever. He would never hurt him again...**

**-**********************-...**

**At the dinner table, Waka and her family were engaged in a discussion about anything they could think of. They told Ruki every embarrassing story about Waka, laughing loudly. Ruki smiled, never taking his eyes off of Waka. She looked to radiant when she smiled...**

**After dinner, Waka and Jyou went to their room, while Ruki went to the guest room...**

"**Holy shit! Waka, he is so amazing! Auntie and Uncle love him too, major plus! Well done!" Waka laughed as she brushed out Jyou's hair...**

"**You use way too much hairspray."...**

"**I know, I know. Auntie tells me every day that my—"...**

"**Your hairs going to fall out." They spoke at the same time and started laughing...**

"**Yeah, she used to tell me that too when I started dying my hair. Here, brush it yourself. I'm going to go say goodnight to everyone." Jyou pulled the brush roughly through her hair and raised her hand in acknowledgement to Waka...**

**After saying goodnight to her family, Waka knocked on Ruki's door. There was no response. She knocked again, slowly pushing the door open...**

"**Ruki?" he was curled up on the bed, on top of the covers, shaking. "Ruki!" Waka ran to him. "Ruki, what's wrong? Why are you crying? Did someone say something to you?" Ruki sniffed and sat up, wiping his eyes,...**

"**No, no."...**

"**Then what?"...**

"**It's just…I have never been accepted by any family before." Waka stared at him...**

"**Never?"...**

"**My father left when I was 13, my mother blamed me for his leaving. She hated me ever since that day. When I was 16 I discovered drugs. It was the only escape I could find that wouldn't kill me right away. I never told my boyfriend—"...**

"**Shou?"...**

"**Yeah. I never told him about my problems. That's why I left. I went to rehab. I knew I had to get my life back together."...**

"**You're clean now, right?"...**

"**Yes. I haven't seen or touched a drug is eight years."...**

"**Congrats."...**

"**Thanks. But my mom, she found out about the whole drug thing. Just gave her another reason to hate me. Then she…" he stopped. Trying to regain himself. ...**

"**It's ok. Skip that part if it's easier."...**

"**Let's just say she died. Your aunt today..." his voice began to quiver, "she made me feel loved. She treated me the way I always wanted my mother to treat me." Waka smiled and kissed him on the forehead...**

"**Well then. Welcome to the family." She patted him on the cheek and left the room...**

"**Goodnight." She said as she closed the door...**

**-**********************-...**

"_What are you gonna do now?" Ruki asked..._

"_I dunno. Both parents are gone now. I don't know where I'll end up"..._

"_Sorry for your loss dear."..._

"_Thank you, Aunt Tsukiko."..._

"_You could totally live with your Aunt."Ruki joked trying to make Shou laugh, which he did..._

"_No way, dude, her house smells funny. And I'm almost positive she has like six billion cats."..._

"_Shit."..._

"_I know, right?..._

_Both boys laughed..._

"_Shou…Shou…"..._

"**SHOU!"Yomi yelled...**

"**Huh?"...**

"**You alright?"...**

"**Yeah. I just spaced out, sorry."...**

"**Wanna get some food? Maybe..OO maybe we can get some takayoki? Yes. That's decided. My mouth is watering, look I'm drooling." Shou laughed...**

"**Sounds—"...**

"**Awesome? Yeah I know! C'mon let's go!" Yomi hopped off the bed and ran down the hall, full speed. Shou watched in amazement...**

"**That man has too much energy, I swear to god."...**

"**Hurry!" Yomi yelled from outside...**

"**How the f…I'll be right down!" Shou smiled as he slid on his sweater...**

**Chapter 26...**

**Back home, Jui started fixing dinner when Riku walked in. he kissed Jui on the shoulder and wrapped his arms around Jui's small waist. Jui pu the knife down and turned to face Riku...**

"**You wanna eat tonight?" he joked. Riku smiled...**

"**Yeah?"...**

"**Then you need to let me go so I can cook."...**

"**Nah, that's ok. You can cook with me hugging you."Jui laughed. "What if we go out to eat?" Riku asked, resting his chin on Jui's shoulder...**

"**I kinda want to stay home, if that's ok."...**

"**Sure, we can get something delivered."...**

"**What are you planning?" Jui sneered. He was suspicious of Riku...**

"**Oh, nothing."Riku smiled and walked down the hallway. Jui wiped his hands on the towel and tossed it onto the counter...**

"**What is up that mans sleeve? He's such a mystery." Jui muttered to himself as he followed RIku down the hall...**

**-**********************-...**

**Yomi dragged Shou through the market. He pointing out every food he had ever eaten and told Shou exactly what he thought of each flavor. Shou smiled. He was happy to see that, even through the hardest of times, Yomi could always manage to keep a smile on his face...**

"**Yomi, how about sushi and takayoki? Just something light."...**

"**Dude, my mouth is watering because of all this food. I'll eat a damn tree at now if it was offered to me."...**

"**Ok." Shou scanned the shelves for the ingredients they needed, while Yomi grabbed boxes of Ramen and cookies and threw them into the basket. Tonight would be the first night of Yomi and Shou's new life together. No more secrets. No more lies. It wouldn't be perfect, but it would work. Shou took Yomi's hand into his own. As they walked down the aisles, Yomi's words echoed in Shou's head...**

"_It will be hard, but we have each other to lean on. We will fight and say things we won't mean to say, but our love will always persevere. Stay with me forever, Shou."..._

"**I will." Shou whispered as Yomi pranced ahead of him down the aisle. "Always and forever,"...**

**-**********************-...**

**Waka threw her phone across the room and sat on her bed, arms crossed over her chest. Ruki knocked lightly on the door...**

"**Waka? You ok?" he walked in, leaving the door slightly open behind him...**

"**Hey, Ruk. Yeah, I'm alright. My ex keeps harassing me, that's all."...**

"**That's all? Who is he? I'll tear his face off!"...**

"**She. And I don't think you could, she's considerably taller than you." Waka gave him a teasing smile...**

"**Gee, thanks a lot."...**

"**Not a problem." She laughed...**

"**So, what are the plans for today?"...**

"**Well, Jyou is begging me to do something with her, and she wants you to come along. I suppose the fate of the day rests in her hands." Ruki laughed...**

"**God save us."...**

"**I don't think even god can save us from whatever Jyou has planned." The both laughed as Jyou came in the room...**

"**Oh, sorry. I should have knocked first."...**

"**Jyou, it's ok, c'mon in. we were just talking about you."...**

"**Good things, I hope."...**

"**What else?" Jyou smiled...**

"**So, today I thought we'd just hit up market places and malls. I'm meeting some friends at around four, so I won't have you the whole day,"...**

"**Damn, Ruki we should have made dinner plans."Ruki laughed...**

"**Well, we have all day to think of something."...**

"**This is true. Ok, Jyou. Take us on an adventure." Jyou raised her hands to her mouth and started giggling insanely. They left the room as Waka's cell phone began buzzing in the corner behind the dresser...**

**-**********************-...**

"**Riku? Riku, where'd you go?" Jui checked every room and found Riku nowhere. He wasn't panicking because Riku was gone, but because every time he disappeared like this, Jui ended up getting tackled. He knew Riku was lurking in the shadows somewhere waiting to pounce on him. Sure enough, Riku jumped onto Jui from behind, making Jui gasp...**

"**Dammit, Riku!" he laughed and so did Riku. "what the hell, man?"...**

"**Jui, there are some things I wanna talk to you about."...**

"**Like what?"...**

"**Let's order dinner first."...**

**Chapter 27...**

**Ruki held Waka's hand as Jyou skipped ahead of them down the market. Waka rested her head on Ruki's shoulder as they walked. Jyou suddenly stopped walking and pulled out her phone...**

"**Seriously? Waka, Rei is calling ME now!"...**

"**Rei?"...**

"**My ex. Do not answer it, Jyou."...**

"**Ok." She put the phone back in her pocket and continued her jumping. Ruki was looking at the shops next to him, when he felt Waka pull away. He turned to see that someone was pulling her away...**

"**Hey! What the fuck? Let her go!" Ruki grabbed Waka's arm...**

"**She's still my girlfriend!"...**

"**Rei! Let me go! Good god. I broke up with you 2 years ago! How did you find me here?"...**

"**I have my ways. Why didn't you answer any of my calls? And who the hell is this prick?"...**

"**Excuse me?"...**

"**Ruki, let me handle this."...**

"**No! listen here, lady, Waka has obviously moved on! Maybe it's time that you did too!" Ruki yanked Waka from Rei's grasp...**

"**No, no she loves me! Waka! Tell him you love me!" Rei became angry, her eyes filling with tears...**

"**Guys, whats going on?"...**

"**Jyou, stand back!" Ruki pushed her back with his arm. "C'mon, Waka." Ruki put his arms around both Waka and Jyou, leading them away from Rei...**

**There was a loud bang and someone screamed. Ruki blinked...**

"_He left because of you, ya know! He always hated you. I hate you!"..._

"_Mommy, I'm sorry for whatever I did! All I want is your love! Just one ounce of affection, that's all I ask from you!"..._

"_Fuck off! You ruined my life!"..._

"_Mom? What are you..N-"..._

_*Bang*..._

_Her body stood motionless for a few seconds before it fell to the floor. The blood oozed from the hole in her head. Her eyes were open and twitching when Ruki approached her..._

"_Mommy?" he held her limp lifeless in his arms, the blood staining his clothes. He was now totally alone. Totally unloved. He cried out..._

"**Ruki! Oh god, no! no!" Ruki looked down to see blood seeping onto his white shirt, dampening the fabric. He fell to his knees. Waka ran to him, placing her arm behind his head, allowing his body to crumble into her grasp. He blinked as he looked at her face...**

"**For god's sake, would somebody please call an ambulance? Please!" Jyou stood in shock, looking down at all the blood. Another shot rang out and Jyou screamed. Ruki's eyes widened as Waka fell forward onto him. Ruki pulled himself out from under Waka with what little strength he had left. He coughed, pulling her body into his arms. Both were covered in blood. Ruki turned Waka's body over to find she was already dead. The bullet had gone right through her head, killing her instantly. Jyou cried outwhen she saw Waka and fell to her knees. Ruki looked at her as people gathered around them. ...**

**Ruki winced from his physical pain, but his tears fell from his emotion pain. He was crushed. Everyone he ever loved was taken away from him. He hung his head, tears falling from his eyelashes onto Waka's face. He felt light headed. Closing his eyes, Ruki fell forward onto Waka...**

**Chapter 28...**

"**Riku, I really wish you would quit being so secretive!"...**

"**Just wait until the food gets here, and then we'll talk." Jui sighed...**

"**Fine, just tell me one thing. Is this a good or bad thing you want to talk about?" Riku smiled deviously at Jui...**

"**You can wait." The doorbell rang and Jui began to feel slightly nervous. Now that the food was here, he wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to Riku anymore...**

"**What did you order?" RIku asked looking through the bag of food. Jui pointed...**

"**That."...**

"**Ok, just making sure everything is here." Riku got two plates and two wine glasses. "We still have some wine, right? Uruha didn't drink it all the last time he was here?"...**

"**We should have some."Jui began to rummage through the cabinets. He pulled out three bottles of wine and turned to Riku. "I think we have some wine." Riku laughed...**

**They sat down and began eating in silence. Jui raised some food to his mouth and looked up at Riku. Riku was looking back at him...**

"**You ready to talk now?" Jui asked, lowering his chopsticks to his plate...**

"**Yes. I'm just going to get straight to the point."...**

"**That would be nice." Jui sat back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest...**

"**Jui?"...**

"**Yeah?"...**

"**Will you marry me?"...**

**-**********************-...**

"_Mom? Mom, is that you?"..._

"_What are you doing here? You're way too early!"..._

"_What do you mean?"..._

"_You've got your whole life ahead of you. We're not ready for you here yet."..._

"_Waka?"..._

"_She can't hear you. Go Back."..._

"_There's nothing left for me there, mom! Let me stay! Please!"..._

"_You're all grown up, but you have so much more growing up to do. Go back. We'll be here when the time comes. Go now, child, go."..._

"_MOM!"..._

**There was a faint beeping on one side and a rhythmic hissing on the other when he opened his eyes. A muffled voice from above called for a . The room was gray and blurry and seemed to be spinning...**

***Dr. Daichi to intensive care please, Dr. Daichi to intensive care*...**

**He was alone again. All his life he was alone. And now, it had happened again. He lay there, wishing over and over that he had died with her or instead of her. She was so young and had so much to live for. And who was he? Nobody. Who loved him? No one. Nobody loved him and nobody ever would. He slowly moved his arm towards the chords of the machines keeping him alive. A strong hand grabbed his arm...**

"**What the hell are you doing?" he looked and saw Shou sitting by his side. He squeezed his eyes shut, a tear freeing itself down his cheek. His lips moved in an attempt to speak...**

"**Shh, Ruki, don't try to talk. There's a tube down your throat helping you to breathe." Ruki's hand moved up to his throat. He paused, then pointed to the notebook and pen next to his bed. Shou handed it to him...**

_**Is she really gone?...**_

"**Yes, Ruki. I'm so sorry."...**

_**How did you get here?...**_

"**Yomi brought me. He's waiting outside."...**

_**Really?...**_

"**Yeah, he knows you and I were good friends through childhood…God, Ruki, " Shou buried his face in Ruki's arm and began to cry. "I was so scared you were gone." Ruki grabbed his notebook again. Shou raised his head, sniffing, and looked at what Ruki was writing...**

_**Shou. I will always love you. You're like a brother to me. Go now. Leave me. Go to Yomi. Spend as much time with his as possible. You two really have something special. Don't ever let him lose you like I did...**_

"**I won't." Shou cried. He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath to compose himself. "Do you want me to tell Byou?"...**

_**No, it's best if he didn't know. Go now...**_

"**Ok. I love you, Ruki."...**

**Chapter 29**

**"How is he?" Yomi jumped up from his seat when Shou approached him.**

**"He's, ah, I honestly don't know. He's stable and conscious, but..." Shou hung his head.**

**"Shou, I'm so sorry." Yomi hugged him and rubbed his back.**

**"It's ok," Shou sighed, " Now, shall we go home and eat this delicious dinner we just bought?"**

**"I thought you'd never ask."**

**"Are...are you serious?" Jui dropped his chopsticks onto his plate.**

**"Yes! why would I lie about this?"**

**"I didn't think you were lying, Riku, it's just-holy shit-really?"**

**"Yes!" RIku laughed.**

**"Why? All i ever do is hurt you!"**

**"Jui, you may hurt me, but ya know something? You always come back. You never pushed me away, not once. You promising to be with me forever will ensure that, even through all our fuck ups, you will always come back. You will always be with me. We will always have each other." Jui's eyes teared up.**

**"You're... you're serious?"**

**"As serious as I've ever been about anything."**

**"Y-Yes..yes, yes, yes! Absolutely yes!" Jui ran to Riku and threw his arms around his neck. Riku smiled and held Jui close.**

**"I love you, Jui."**

**"And I love you, Riku!"**

**Chapter 30(The Last Chapter)**

**Yomi and Shou went home and enjoyed each othher's company as much as possible. They argued, they laughed, they cried, but all in all, they loved each other. Through every rough time and through every good time, they loved each other with all their hearts. Yomi was more understanding, and Shou was more loyal. Love, no matter how small a flame, will thrive if the person making the fire wants it to thrive. The flame between between Shou and Yomi started as a spark, but soon ignited into a small flame. Through time, it would explode into a bonfire.**

**"Always and forever." Shou whispered in Yomi's ear as they fell asleep.**

**Ruki lay on his back staring at the ceiling. He was destined to be alone. Destined to be unloved. Nurses came and went, poking him with needles and checking the machines keeping him alive. Ruki continuously closed his eyes in hopes of a small glimpse of Waka's smiling face. How he missed her. Alone in the hospital, Ruki cried and prayed for death. He cried and prayed for Waka. He cried and prayed for love. Would he ever find a love like Waka again? He closed his eyes and quietly fell asleep. He hoped one day to see her again. Just for one more minute.**

**"Yes? Oh, thank god!" Riku hugged Jui like he would never let him go again. "Never leave me again, Jui, never." Jui pulled away.**

**"Riku, those past lovers mean nothing to me now. I was filled with false passion for them. All that I need now is you, and only you. I cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you."**

**Byou sat at the computer with Kazuki sitting behind him. Kazuki reached over and poked Byou in the back of the neck repeatedly. Byou slammed his hands onto the keyboard and turned towards Kazuki, who was in fits of laughter. Byou smiled and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. Kazuki suddenly sprung out of his chair and tackled Byou to the floor.**

**"Stay with me forever, Byou." Kazuki snuggled to his face into Byou's neck.**

**"Only if you get off of me!" They both laughed and exchanged a small kiss.**

**"You know you like me on top of you." Kazuki smirked. "But, I'm being serious. Will you stay with me forever?" Byou sat up and pulled Kazuki's head to his shoulder.**

**"Kazuki, you are the only person I have ever really loved. I feel kind of selfish keeping you all to myself, but honestly, I don't give a shit. You are my selfish love."**


End file.
